Hello pooles
Welcome.
I am sorry to hear that you are struggling to maintain a close relationship with your 23 year old son, I understand how you must be feeling, I struggled with my son too.
You say that he has moved across the country to take a job, and whilst I get it that you feel relief because of that, you are also feeling sad that he is unhealthy and you can’t have a closer relationship with him. Do you think that you are also feeling sad because he has moved away and you are unable to help him? I remember with my son, I was desperate to help him, desperate for him to seek help and get better.
When did your son move to start his new job? Are you in close contact?
I hope you take the time to look around the site and to also read other’s posts, I’m sure you will find it most helpful, we are all here to support you pooles x