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Author Topic: Hello world  (Read 427 times)
Huda
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 1
« on: December 12, 2018, 05:17:56 AM »
Hi all,

I'm new here.

I was raised by a mother with borderline personality disorder.

She became abusive if I expressed any emotion other than happiness. So for my safety and survival, I learned to plaster a stepford smile on my face 24/7.

It was only in my 40's that I realized that I'm allowed to feel anger, fear, shame, and sadness.

Thanks,
Huda
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Panda39
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner’s ex
Relationship status: SO and I have been together 9 years and have just moved in together this summer.
Posts: 3462
« Reply #1 on: December 12, 2018, 07:37:17 AM »
Hi Huda,

Welcome to the BPD Family  Welcome new member (click to insert in post) You are not alone in your experience many here have had a similar experience.

It's all about the person with BPD and their feelings and no one else can have their own.  I'm on these boards because my significant other (SO) has an undiagnosed BPD ex-wife (uBPDxw) and they share two daughters.  After doing something hurtful or unacceptable his ex would literally tell him "you can't be mad at me" (Wanna bet!).  Your  "Stepford Wife" description is right on the money.

What led to your break through around your feelings, and your ability to allow yourself to have those "negative" feelings?  When did you find out about BPD? 

I'm glad you've joined us there is a lot of support, information and tools here that I'm sure you will find helpful.

Panda39
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"Have you ever looked fear in the face and just said, I just don't care" -Pink
Harri
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 5981
« Reply #2 on: December 12, 2018, 03:07:45 PM »
Hi!  Joining Panda here and saying welcome  Welcome

Panda already asked what I am wondering:  what helped you to see you could have and express other feeling rather than smiling your way through life?

I hope you share more of your story and that you just dig in and start reading and posting in other threads.  We are a peer support community and help each other.

Again, welcome!
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  "What is to give light must endure burning." ~Viktor Frankl
JNChell
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Dissolved
Posts: 3520
« Reply #3 on: December 12, 2018, 09:31:28 PM »
Hi, Huda. Is your mother diagnosed? Living with this stuff can consume us. I’m sorry that you’re having to experience what you are. There is nothing easy about this stuff. Are you comfortable in explaining the feelings that you described?
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“Adversity can destroy you, or become your best seller.”
-a new friend
Turkish
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Relationship status: "Divorced"/abandoned by SO in Feb 2014; Mother with BPD, PTSD, Depression and Anxiety: RIP in 2021.
Posts: 12179


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« Reply #4 on: December 13, 2018, 09:54:35 PM »
How was your mother abusive,  and what is your contact like now? I'm glad you found us and we'd love to support you Huda 
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    “For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.” ― Rudyard Kipling
JNChell
a.k.a. "WTL"
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Dissolved
Posts: 3520
« Reply #5 on: December 24, 2018, 11:07:41 AM »
Hey, Huda. Just wanted to give a shoutout. We hope you’re well and would like to hear back from you!
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“Adversity can destroy you, or become your best seller.”
-a new friend
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