Daughter w BPD symptoms

[Jmj03]

Hello, this personality disorder is new to me. What's the best way to be a friend/mother to an adult daughter who may have borderline personality disorder? How can I help her find good therapist near Atlanta? She has mentioned needing help but we are both at a loss due to several past psychology failures who could neither diagnose nor help with effective life changing treatment.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Only Human]

Hi jmj03

Welcome to BPD Family.

You've come to a good place for support for yourself and information about BPD. It's great she is wanting help, and that she's talking to you about it. It sounds like she trusts you.

As for finding a good therapist, look for someone who has more than a passing knowledge of personality disorders, someone with loads of experience in this area is ideal. People with BPD (pwBPD) can be a challenge for a therapist without experience.

Can you tell us some of her behaviors that led you to consider that she may have BPD?

Again, welcome to the family. I'm glad you've found us and that you've reached out to us. We're here to help.

~ OH

[Jmj03]

Online video describing the BPD condition I sent to my daughter. She identified with nearly all of them:
Fear of abandonment
Intense relationships
Identity disturbance
Impulsivity (debt, shopping, drugs)
Recurrent suicidal ideation
Affective instability (mood swings)
Chronic feeling of emptiness
Inappropriate/intense show of anger
Transient stress induced paranoid ideation.
This describes her so well & no one in the family knows what to do.
Thanks for your reply.

[Only Human]

It sure sounds like she is BPD.

It's great you are supporting her in getting some answers, and that she's open to getting therapy.

We can best support our children by listening with empathy, validating their feelings, and most importantly taking care of ourselves.

You say that no one in the family knows what to do, makes sense. As you've discovered, even professionals miss the mark at times.

As you are new to BPD, I invite you to check out the thread pinned to the top of this board. How to get the most out of this site
https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=331689.0

There's a lot of information on this site and it can be overwhelming so please continue to post, ask questions, read and participate in others' posts. You will find support and comfort here.

~ OH

[Lollypop]

Hi there Jmj

I just wanted to say hello. I’m glad you found us.

When my son was dx with BPD at 24 I didn’t understand what it meant. For me, it was a relief at first as I’d always known there was something wrong. For him, he felt relief too - then his response changed to hopelessness. I’ve learnt how to better interact with him using the skills and techniques I’ve learnt here. He’s now 28 and functioning.

How are you feeling about the diagnosis? It can be overwhelming.

How’s your daughter and does she live with you?

Hugs

LP