Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
October 14, 2024, 10:35:56 PM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Beware of Junk Psychology... Just because it's on the Internet doesn't mean it's true. Not all blogs and online "life coaches" are reliable, accurate, or healthy for you. Remember, there is no oversight, no competency testing, no registration, and no accountability for many sites - it is up to you to qualify the resource. Learn how to navigate this complicated arena...
115
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: WHO SHOULD POST ON THIS BOARD? - Detaching  (Read 7158 times)
Skip
Site Director
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 7030


« on: January 02, 2019, 08:16:45 AM »

Relationship Ended - Detaching

Summary: Detach and grieve a “BPD” relationship breakup, do a post mortem, process abandonment anxiety, and betrayal trauma.  Also divorce recovery and personal inventory.

Audience: Members that have been spurned or have evaluated the emotional health of their relationship and have decided that it is best to detach and move on.

Objective: To get through the stages of detachment and move into learning from our experience:

  • Acknowledgment- we begin by acknowledging and working with our feelings.

  • Self-Inquiry- we then probe the feelings - it's important to find a way to explore your feelings that allows you both to be present with them and to stand a little aside from them.

  • Processing- become aware of what has been useful in the journey you've just taken, regardless of how it all turned out.

  • Creative Action- start something new with real enthusiasm for the doing of it, rather than out of the need to prove something.

  • Freedom - the stage when thinking about your loss (or the thing you desire) doesn't interfere with your normal feelings of well-being.

General Approach: People with Borderline Personality Disorder have a history of stormy dysfunctional relationships. Members leave Borderline relationships because they are rejected or they need to protect themselves or protect their children from emotional or verbal abuse. But most departing partners struggle to disengage because they are bonded to an unhealthy partner in an unhealthy way.

The Detaching board is for grieving the loss of the relationship, doing the postmortem to understand what really happened, and working together to get in touch with our own feelings and the issues that lead us to the unhealthy bonding to begin with.

Comment:
Grieving is defined by Elizabeth Kübler-Ross, MD. as five stages:
  • Denial
  • Anger
  • Bargaining
  • Depression
  • Acceptance

Detachment is a multistage process that includes :
  • Acknowledgement
  • Self-inquiry
  • Processing
  • Creative Action
  • Freedom

We ask all members to review the Lessons as they have time.

« Last Edit: July 09, 2019, 06:33:48 PM by Harri » Logged

 
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!