Mosaic threat assessment

[onthewater79]

Hello everyone,

I am very eager to take the Mosaic threat assessment test as I am in an increasingly volatile, and possibly dangerous, relationship with a pwBPD. I have tried to register on the Mosaic site to take the test, but have not received a password via email despite multiple attempts. Does one need to be patient for this process? Anyone else have this issue?

Thanks v much and apologies if I have placed this question in the wrong grouping.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Harri]

Hi.  I am sorry I did not see this sooner.

Have you checked your spam folder?

I have not heard of anyone having this problem (I know that is not helpful though)

[AskingWhy]

You should be able to begin the assessment immediately after registering.  Could you try to create another profile under a different e-mail account?

[onthewater79]

Thanks to both of you for the responses. I have tried w/ multiple emails but to no avail yet. Will keep trying.

[Harri]

Does this help?

Q: Is my web browser supported by MOSAIC?
A: MOSAIC requires that you use one of the following browsers:
Internet Explorer (Version 8.x + preferred)
Mozilla Firefox (Version 3.x + preferred)
Safari


Read tech support here:
https://www.mosaicmethod.com/?page=tech_support

[onthewater79]

Success -- just got the registration email and took the test.

Scored 7 out of 10.

@Harri, wondering what this means in context and how it may inform the decisions I make. Eager for your thoughts.

Many thanks

[Harri]

Hi!  I'm glad you finally were able to take the assessment!  Whew!

The score is an indication of potential risk.  At 7, I would say the risk is definitely there and I would recommend your next step be working on a safety plan should things escalate and you need to leave.  It is always better to be prepared rather than caught by surprise.  I am not saying things will escalate but the potential is there.

We have one here you can use: SAFETY FIRST
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SAFTY PLAN

Are you in therapy?  I am not saying there is anything wrong with you (  ) I want to get an idea of the kind of support you may have.  Are others outside of your home aware of how he gets?  That you do not feel safe?

We talked a bit about boundaries and how setting them at first can result in extinction bursts.  Did you have a chance to read the article?  I ask because I think removing yourself when you do not feel safe is necessary and that him threatening your life and being violent with objects needs to be addressed.  What do you think?

Oh!  did you read the information that is at the bottom of your results on the Mosaic?  It talks about domestic violence (DV) and has some excellent information in it.  I think you would benefit by reading it.  I believe at least part of it is from the book "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin De Becker who developed the MOSAIC method.

[onthewater79]

Thank you for all this information -- very, very helpful. I will move forward with the safety plan.

In answer to your Qs:

- I have not told family or friends in detail about the severity of the situation. Some close friends are aware of how chaotic things can be, however, and certainly note his severe mood swings (I don't know if it's possible to have both bipolar and BPD, but he seems to exhibit traits of both). My mother in particular is quite concerned and wants to support me, but we live on opposite sides of the country.

- I do have a therapist and though our meetings are erratic (I travel a lot for work), I do find the support helpful. He has been in a session with my partner in the past (he was previously and briefly our couples therapist), and the therapist have to stop a rant to ask if he (my partner) was threatening to kill him (the therapist), threatening to kill me, or threatening to kill himself (my partner then backed down).

I will take a look at the reading materials you mentioned, thank you. I am quite afraid of any extinction outbursts moving forward.

[Harri]

I am quite afraid of any extinction outbursts moving forward.

I understand.

Sometimes, maybe most times, I think fear can be an asset to us.  Rather than fearing what may happen if there are extinction bursts, use the fear to motivate you to develop a safety plan and learn about setting boundaries, and really think about how you want this relationship to evolve and if that is even feasible.  Fear can be motivating and can provide clarity if we use it to our advantage.