DIVORCE OR NOT

[BorderSanity]

I've been married to my wife for 33 years. We have 2 adult children. I found out 8 weeks ago by happen-stance that my wife is a Borderline. If she is, my daughter most certainly is and to some degree my son as well. I personally am in the best place emotionally and financially that I have ever been. I have stayed separated for 8 weeks now and I have been doing all kinds of research. She has told me over and over again that she cannot change. I feel like I have put in my time with her and want to move on. She has some wonderful traits, however, which make me hesitate. No therapist near me seems to know much about BPD.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[blue_watermelon]

Hi BorderSanity,

It sounds like something really big must have happened 8 weeks ago, to both cause you to separate and give you insight about the BPD diagnosis.

You asked about divorce or not. Do you think learning more about BPD could be helpful for you in improving your relationship with your spouse and kids?