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How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
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Author Topic: Ted007 insane life  (Read 597 times)
Teddy007
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: broken up
Posts: 69


« on: December 13, 2019, 03:12:37 PM »

So i have been posting here maybe to much. And you guys have been a blessing for me. Well now the thing is, that my ex has left the rebound guy and want to come back!

I had her over and talked with her. Said that i am gonna think about it. She stayed the night. Nothing happen between us but still this was a mistake.

I know the answer i am gonna get. Never ever take her back. And it is really hard to know that this is what i should do. But one thing that really feels good is that she is writing me telling me that it was all a mistake and that she loves me.

I know this is desperate for supply and just bulls&%it. But still it feels good for the ego. I have to say that. And i would really want "sinisters" opinion about this. The same cycle with start from the beginning and turn out the same way. But my thoughts about it gives me some power and i feel stronger.

Cheers.
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SinisterComplex
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Broken Up
Posts: 1325



« Reply #1 on: December 13, 2019, 04:58:54 PM »

Teddy, well ask and you shall receive.

I will not judge you. I will not chastise you. Everyone is their own person and has to handle things in their own manner. I can only hope that my words, views, and advice help make better informed decisions. You are the master of your own world.

You did need the ego boost. However, I strongly caution you to let it stop there. Think about how much pain and suffering you have gone through? No one is worth that. I have bared witness here online in a forum how much torment has been placed up on you. You deserve better and you deserve more respect. However, respect yourself first. I am glad nothing sexual happened. A wise piece of advice from one of my good buddies is to always respect your pen*s above all else.

Your thought process is on the right track. Make no mistake about this...this is a ploy to hook you in again because you are viewed as safe and an easy mark for her. Harsh to hear, but it is the truth. (This is where you need to have the thought to yourself...B to the itch PLEASE! I am not buying this load of BS anymore!)

What you do is up to you, but what I think is in your best interest is to have a closure conversation...that is what I think you really need. If you are the one to pull the plug and be done you will empower yourself and send a message to yourself that you are deserving of respect and healthy love and treatment.

Keep venting and keep continuing to make progress Teddy. Regression is never a good thing and is something you fight back with flipping the double middle finger to!

Cheers my friend!

-SC-
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Woolspinner2000
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Relationship status: Divorced
Posts: 2012



« Reply #2 on: December 14, 2019, 05:32:15 AM »

Hi Teddy007,

I'm sure it feels great to have her back...for now. As you noted, you understand the facts. Sounds like the emotions you're having are helping you at the moment to feel great. What will you do with the chasm that exists between your feelings and the facts?

Hang on through this.

Wools
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There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.  -C.S. Lewis
Teddy007
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: broken up
Posts: 69


« Reply #3 on: December 15, 2019, 05:34:45 AM »

I am gonna be a little bit personal. I just want to give thanks to everybody here. All the time spent reading all the stories. It is truly sad to see so much pain, and going through it myself.

I woke up the day after i wrote this post and felt really bad. I have had enough. I blocked her and will never contact her again. I am a 36 year old finnis/english/russian&swedish cocktail man. I have been really successful in almost everything i have done in my life. I am a business man and own 2 restaurants, a taxi service and 4 apartments.

Always been a ladies man and never sucked at life. Eat healthy, work out a lot and enjoy life. Have so many friends and people like me. This is the most pathetic i have ever been in my life and now it have to stop!

I thank you all for the support and this site has been a blessing. But now it´s time to stop being a needy bit#ch! We all deserve better and one day we will all come back to this site or look back at this  and count our blessings.

Borderline or not, if somebody treats you bad and won´t respect you for your values or who you are than you should not give them the time of day. Not even one second. I have come to realise that reading about this all the time, watching youtube videos is not a healthy thing. We are not special and  nothing is complicated and life is unfair.

We will all get over it and one day win in life, this is not a life worth living. We all just need to wake up and know our own values. Childhood trauma or not. I wish you all the best and good luck. This will be my last post here.

God bless, may we all meet in valhalla and meet with Odin for a beer or 20!
« Last Edit: December 21, 2019, 04:11:19 PM by Harri, Reason: removed facebook link pursuant to guideline 1.15 » Logged
Teddy007
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: broken up
Posts: 69


« Reply #4 on: December 15, 2019, 03:06:39 PM »

I am gonna be a little bit personal. I just want to give thanks to everybody here. All the time spent reading all the stories. It is truly sad to see so much pain, and going through it myself.

I woke up the day after i wrote this post and felt really bad. I have had enough. I blocked her and will never contact her again. I am a 36 year old finnis/english/russian&swedish cocktail man. I have been really successful in almost everything i have done in my life. I am a business man and own 2 restaurants, a taxi service and 4 apartments.

Always been a ladies man and never sucked at life. Eat healthy, work out a lot and enjoy life. Have so many friends and people like me. This is the most pathetic i have ever been in my life and now it have to stop!

I thank you all for the support and this site has been a blessing. But now it´s time to stop being a needy bit#ch! We all deserve better and one day we will all come back to this site or look back at this  and count our blessings.

Borderline or not, if somebody treats you bad and won´t respect you for your values or who you are than you should not give them the time of day. Not even one second. I have come to realise that reading about this all the time, watching youtube videos is not a healthy thing. We are not special and  nothing is complicated and life is unfair.

We will all get over it and one day win in life, this is not a life worth living. We all just need to wake up and know our own values. Childhood trauma or not. I wish you all the best and good luck. This will be my last post here.


God bless, may we all meet in valhalla and meet with Odin for a beer or 20!
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SinisterComplex
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Broken Up
Posts: 1325



« Reply #5 on: December 15, 2019, 04:57:08 PM »

Teddy, if you do check in...I sincerely wish you the best. Take care of yourself. You will continue to win at life as long as you believe in yourself and keep the positive mindsets to move forward. Let the negatives go and enjoy your life amigo.

Cheers and best wishes!

-SC-
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confusedbybdp
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Broken Up
Posts: 75



« Reply #6 on: December 21, 2019, 04:07:31 PM »

 Welcome new member (click to insert in post)

Teddy, you will always have a "home" here.  We are people who have been in the foxhole with you during a rough time in your life (and ours), and we will always consider you a friend.

Good luck to you, and do keep in touch, if you are able!

 Virtual hug (click to insert in post)
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Teddy007
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: broken up
Posts: 69


« Reply #7 on: December 22, 2019, 12:40:09 PM »

Thank you for your kind words. Struggling today =(
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Harri
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 5981



« Reply #8 on: December 22, 2019, 09:47:30 PM »

Teddy:
Excerpt
And now im hurting really really bad. Like feeling as i don´t want to live... First times i have had thoughts about things like not wanting to live...
Hi Teddy.  I don't think I have talked with you before.  How are you doing?  What I quoted here is pretty serious and I am concerned.  Has this feeling been ongoing?  Are you talking with people, trying to get help?
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  "What is to give light must endure burning." ~Viktor Frankl
Teddy007
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: broken up
Posts: 69


« Reply #9 on: December 23, 2019, 12:19:08 AM »

last couple of days or at nights. I am talking to someone, and i have a good support network, but i have fallen for the charm like 5 times now in 4 months and she is really out to destroy me. I am going to write more on this forum how i feel.

The panic attacks and the trauma has become much worse. And this time of year, christamas, worst christmas yet!
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Harri
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 5981



« Reply #10 on: December 23, 2019, 12:24:51 AM »

Okay, good, I am glad you will start a separate thread about it.  We can support you too and maybe offer some coping skills you can use.

I'll look for a new thread from you.   Virtual hug (click to insert in post)
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  "What is to give light must endure burning." ~Viktor Frankl
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