Transitioning from partner to carer after initiating a breakup with bpd ex

[Bri of Ohi]

Don't take this wrong Terriblehats,  but your journal above is curiously familiar.  As if you were my ex writing about how you were dealing with me.  The timeline is very close to mine.
They have undiagnosed BPD an believe I am the with the/a disorder (long story). My significant other is very intelligent and sweet to other's, going to great lengths for other people.  However there are several triggers that will make them behave like a child or act out in rage.  You don't know the trigger until it's been tripped.

Anyway just wanted to say thank you for sharing all your efforts with us. 
And I will say '70/30'. (my ex would know what that means) ;)

[khibomsis]

Hey TH, thanks for checking in! It is great to hear that things are going well with you. I am glad you feel you did the right thing, no matter how hard. Yes, don't be in a hurry to date. For many of us it is good to ponder why we got attracted to a pwBPD in the first place. That is what I am doing. 
I am doing OK too, life been a little crazy but we get along much better. I think there is a lot to be said for the notion that a full-on relationship triggers all their dysfunctions. One of the reasons I left was precisely because I thought I had become her trigger. Now that I am not trying to make it work, we are doing just fine. Helped also by the fact that she is working real hard and is getting better and better control over her dysregulations.
Am I detaching successfully? Probably not. But I look at her improving and think whatever we are doing to make that happen is all good.  Am glad I didn't go NC though it is not easy doing it this way.