I wish there were more DBT Therapists and Programs available. My therapist would say if you have a motivated loved one (to conquer their trauma and use the skills) that is more than half the battle. My daughter left Menninger's Compass Program (Failure to Launch) 2 1/2 years ago. She is actively using her skills, even acting as her own therapist, still getting to therapy and group therapy, working, repairing relationships, taking her meds, cognizant of her values and beliefs and living life with them in tact. Until you can get your beauty into therapy try teaching her some general grounding skills for when her distress is large. I would also focus on Distress Tolerance Skills for her first. For you, work on learning how to validate her feelings.
Last thought, look up NEABPD (
www.borderlinepersonalitydisorder.org) they offer a free 12 week class for family members of a loved one with BPD/Emotion Dysregulation. The class is Family Connections -- you can sign up online to get on the waitlist. There are many helpful resources on their sight as well. Having BPD Family as a resource is fabulous too!
Mama Goose