Not sure where to start

[Worried Dad]

Good evening BDP Family Community.  My daughter, although not technically diagnosed yet(just turned 18) has at least 5 of the 9 symptoms of BDP per the DSM V(I think that's the newest version).  Her pyschiatrist is currenlty treated her for ADHD, Anxiety and some Depression.  We're keeping BDP open since her mother suffers from it and her moods go from zero to 10 in a heartbeat.

Some facts about my daughter:  18 years old, low normal range IQ (90), Low Executive Function, Immaturity, No drugs, Drinking or Sex.  No suicide attempts, impulsive to harm herself when interpersonal relationships go array.  Her brithmother has been hospitiliezed and Diagnosed with BDP and BiPolar.  The BiPoloar came later and i'm not sure how accurate that is...but i'm not the professional.

Example from last night that has made me seek outside support for myseld and my wife.  Last night she thought her boyfriend(long distance relationship) broke up with her.  She came into the kitchen crying looking for a knive to harm herself.  I had to physically restrain her and keep on her with me untilshe calmed down(about an 30 minutes).  I didn't think a 51/50 was necessary as we've been through this before with her.  Her high school did a Self Harm Assessment today and felt she was not a threat to herself.   This episode was the scariest one since she was 5150ed 5 years ago.   She is really attached to this boy and also thinks she might be A-Sexual therefore a lot of conflict is going on in her head. 

My question(s):  We tried DBT group therapy two years ago and were asked to leave after a couple of sessions.  My daughter got uncomftable and upset and made it clear to everyone she didn't want to be there.  She made things very uncomtable for me and the other people in the room.

Has anyone here seen a positve outcome when they force/coerce their child into an out patient or in patient program?  I'm thinking her getting better is going to want to come from within for the healing and openmindeness to work.?

Can CBT therapy also work?

Are there any live support groups on Zoom or other support networks where we can connect on more of a face to face level?

If there are any helpful resources out there(like workbooks for parents) to give guidance on how to stop feeding this perverbial monster of a diesease.  I'm listening to a book on Audible right now that seems helpful. 

Any feedback would be very helpful as I feel lost.  I live in the Bay Area (Northern California) and with 7-8 million residences I can 't find one support group for this darn disease.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[beatricex]

hi WorriedDad,
NAMI has some online support groups.  I am in a different state, but was able to find one that met over zoom.  You will meet parents and spouses of people with mental illness, not specifically BPD. 

https://www.namisf.org/

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