Welcome
SRCyclist,
You have a lot of years invested in your relationship, and kudos to you for the courage to work on you and what you can do.
That's a big deal.
Living with a pwBPD whether they exhibit the traits of BPD or have been diagnosed is challenging to say the least. I'm glad that you've found some relief and gained some understanding by reading Stop Walking on Eggshells. You mentioned your daughter; what are her thoughts about her mom? Has she read the book too?
We have some great resources at the top of this page, and once is about learning to not be invalidating. If you have time to read that, there are some tips that might be helpful to you. Let me know what you think.
Looking forward to hearing more from you.
Do you have a T?
Wools