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Author Topic: Parenting exchange conflict and lessons (not) learned  (Read 409 times)
ForeverDad
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: separated 2005 then divorced
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You can't reason with the Voice of Unreason...


« on: November 26, 2021, 03:52:37 PM »

It has often been noted here that conflict can increase during weekends and holidays.  It can be between partners, at child exchanges, and we have to be alert to such risks.

In the news from Lubbock Texas there was an incident Nov 5, a Friday, where a father was upset and demanding an exchange of the child at the home of the ex-wife's boyfriend.  He was asked to leave, he didn't, tensions rose, the short story is he's dead now. 

Lesson to remember:  "In your face" conflict can easily ramp up emotionally and lead to disaster.  If you have conflict, such as denied access to your child... step back, do not be aggressive, call the police to de-escalate the incident and if necessary resolve the matter in family court.  While it's likely the court may not award make-up time for past incidents — court never awarded me make-up time — at least walking away avoids disastrous outcomes.
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Turkish
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Relationship status: "Divorced"/abandoned by SO in Feb 2013; Mother with BPD, PTSD, Depression and Anxiety: RIP in 2021.
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Dad to my wolf pack


« Reply #1 on: November 27, 2021, 08:49:23 PM »

Good advice. I saw that headline, but didn't read the story other than the bf is claiming self defense.
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    “For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.” ― Rudyard Kipling
CoherentMoose
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« Reply #2 on: November 30, 2021, 09:09:25 AM »

Agree, good advice.  Nothing good happens once emotional flooding starts.  Tragic story. CoMo
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Turkish
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Dad to my wolf pack


« Reply #3 on: November 30, 2021, 08:22:50 PM »

My buddy at work showed me the video. The father was manhandled and getting into the face of the bf who had a rifle or shotgun, initially not pointed at the father.  Once a gun comes out, is "yessir/ma'am" in Texas especially.
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    “For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.” ― Rudyard Kipling
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