Hey Borders123
glad you found us.
There's so much packed into your statement -- wow. It's incredible that she's getting help; I hope that gives you some relief.
And at the same time, you recognize that this is going to be a marathon, not a sprint.
I immediately thought of our article on
Supporting a Child in Therapy for Borderline Personality Disorder, especially the section about "How long does it take to recover". The recommendations are just what you're asking about:
a reminder that
change is difficult, and
a suggestion to
lower your expectations.
That isn't to say that "oh, recovery is impossible". It's rather a sort of unintuitive approach that's needed with a pwBPD: the more sensed pressure there is on a pwBPD to "succeed", or "recover", or "do XYZ", the less likely it is to happen. To support a pwBPD in treatment, lowering emotional pressure can be more helpful than "being a cheerleader" or saying "you're so strong, you can do it". Very unintuitive!
Take a look at the article -- I'd be interested to hear your thoughts on if/how it applies to your situation.
...
How old is your daughter? Is she living at home/with you?