Hi Willow, I can feel your growing concern in your words. If your daughter is threatening suicide, you need to get her to the hospital where she can be stabilized and assessed for treatment.
It’s typical for people with BPD to blame loved ones for all their problems and re-interpret history with the lens of victimhood, looking for signs of abuse. My stepdaughter does this frequently. And she resents being so dependent on her dad for everything (she can’t support herself yet). She surely feels ashamed about that and resents needing help when her siblings and peers are independent. This is painful to her and comes out as angry rants, blaming her parents for making her dysfunctional.
However, now the continued financial support is conditioned upon her getting therapy and following the doctor’s recommendations for medications. She has a choice to skip therapy or meds, but then her dad said he wouldn’t continue to support her. That’s when things started turning around and going in the right direction. It took six long years of increasingly hostile behavior, with suicide attempts and moments of psychosis, to reach that turning point. I wish it had come sooner. But my husband enabled some self-destructive behavior for too long. He didn’t want to send her to the hospital.
Hi, I noticed you said your step-daughter experiences psychosis. Is this typical in persons with BPD? My daughter also experiences periods of psychosis.