We've hit a rough patch in the road again. So, he started a new job 3 months ago. Clean slate, chance to do things better. He has been repeatedly late, got caught playing computer games in work time, doing things with clients without permission, failing to call in when he is 'sick' and a few other things.
He made an inquiry about obtaining the gas but never followed through. And then this week he had his 3 month review where they raised all the above. I think their offer of continued employment on 3 more months of probation was pretty generous. He is not grateful at all and is now complaining that he is handicapped and expected to act like he is not and how unfair it is.
He has been struggling over the last month anyway because he started a course and never finished it. It went as far as him planning on suiciding by gassing himself. I found out about that last weekend.
I feel really angry with him today for being so ungrateful and not taking responsibility for doing this to himself. I don't have any trouble being supportive until he starts acting ungratefully and feeling sorry for himself in a way that seems really unreasonable. I don't know why that is. He is speaking to me like I am a stranger so I can tell he is dissociating and yesterday started changing his passwords to things which is usually a sign of paranoia.
I told him I was worried about him and things I noticed that were signs of him having a hard time. He was very cold and detached and never made any assurances he wasn't suicidal again. Now I feel angry that he is putting me through this again.
I know I should validate his feelings but I spent all week doing that and here we are again this weekend. It feels like being trapped in groundhog day.
You've got a lot going on in your r/s
Can you think of an area of your r/s where you are getting some traction and getting things going in a positive direction for you?