I was at 7 days NC yesterday, but on Sunday I was actually provided with information about my ex that explained everything.
If you don't mind me asking, how did you get the info?
Don't have to answer if you prefer not to.
That night of feeling like I finally had some power in this has been replaced with the guilt of feeling like I rocked this guys world.
I can only speak for myself, but I
would prefer to know.
I've been in both situations;
A) being betrayed up front
B) being betrayed while putting in years of effort, emotion, work and money into something and only finding out down the line
I'll take A anyday!
Good Luck learning to trust again after B! Important lessons
are learned tho.
It was the most difficult thing I'd ever done prior to the BPD relationship... .and probably partly why the BPD relationship fizzled out so fast compared to others I've read about.
Had it not been for the pain, feelings and lessons that resulted from B, I suspect I may never have understood the necessity to get out of the BPD relationship as fast as I did - even when I didn't know about Cluster B.
You may feel guilty now - but you don't know how he feels. Sure, he will feel awful - now - but he
may be eternally grateful.
Take some solace in the fact that
he at least now has a choice, and may in fact be able to protect himself against something potentially much worse in the future.
Hopefully some good comes out of it for them in the long run, but I don't think it was worth it now. If you're thinking of exacting your revenge and breaking NC, I would advise against it. I don't feel any better about it, or about myself for doing it. If this helps any one of you, then I will happily say I took one for the team.
I wouldn't too hard on yourself about it.
You had an emotional over-reaction at worst.
Everyone is capable of an emotional over-reaction - not just pwPDs.
I'd just tell you to recognise that and cut her off totally and utterly.
The emotional reactions won't stop here, if you don't make that decision.