Hi Cloud 9
Welcome to bpdfamily The situation you are in isn't pleasant at all. I am glad you're reaching out for support here. I think you'll find that many of our members will be able to relate to you as we too have family-members with (suspected) BPD in our lives.
Your son is a disabled veteran and you say he was in a really bad place when he got out of the marines. Are you talking about his physical health or also about his mental and emotional health?
Both, he has PTSD and TBI, he was wounded and missing. I received a letter from the marines saying he was dead. Physically he looks ok there is shrapnel in his optic nerve too that gives him trouble. He was blinded for a while but vision has returned. His mental state was what difference does it make. God won't forgive me for the things I had to do. He met this girl at a party right before he checked into VA program. She decided immediately he was the one. He spent about 100 plus days in that program. She picked him up and they were going to the court house to get married. I had met her once I think. Thank god the JP was not available. It took about 2 weeks and they were married. Nine months later Scarlette was born. The light of my life! We immediately formed an in breakable bond. The next year she said she was pregnant again. She said she was going to try to have a baby that loved her. That nobody in her family or anywhere had ever picked her. The only attention she ever got was whining or guilting for it. I never knew any body like that before.
She has tortured him every second of the way.
Could you perhaps elaborate on this? What did she do to your son when they were still together? Since you're here I assume you suspect she might have BPD. Has she as far as you know ever been diagnosed with any kind of disorder?
She found out some of the things he done in the military, they were horrible but it was his job. One especially involved a child. He still sees that kid every time he closes his eyes. She told him if you ever leave me I will tell the Judge and you will never see your kids.
He absolutely couldn't take any more so he left.
She is a second generation,her mother is on husband 6 now. Some times I wonder if they have a soul.
Living with someone who has BPD can really take its toll on you. BPD is quite a challenging disorder and I know from personal experience how hard it can be deal to with someone who has this disorder. How long ago did your son leave her?
The last time Aug 2014.
Our lives are a night mare because of the kids. She immediately moved in with 2 men. One of them has 3 charges of child endangerment.
This sounds very concerning indeed. Does she still live with these men now?
It's crazy we live in a very small town where every body knows every body.
The lady from DHS is friends with these people family and she warned them they better get those kids out. Now I think they are in a town 50 miles away with the other mother that has same condition. She has a new husband and I believe he is a nice man that has no ideal what he got into. Just like us!
She has covered all her bases. She told him one morning that the kids hated him and they never wanted to see him again. When he got really mad she reached in her pocket and turned a tape recorder on, he threatened her. She went straight to the police now he can't even go to school.
I can only imagine how difficult it must be for your son to have her come between him and his kids. Do you mean that he can't go to the school of his kids?
They go to catholic school. School and church are one. He can't go to church, school, ballgames nothing.
Then she slowly started taking them from me. The last time I had the 6 year old. She said grandma my mommie don't like you any more I'm afraid I will never see you any more. I don't know what to do.
How long ago was it that you last saw your grandchildren? Do you perhaps still talk to them on the telephone?
Take care and I hope you'll be able to share some more of your story later
If I called her and Picked her over my son she would think she won something and I could probably see kids. Idk what to do? He is mine, my only child. I won't turn my back on him.
