Discernment

[Parents! Get help here!]

I am presently sponsoring a lady with newly diagnosed BPD and have been reading a lot.  I have an adult child diagnosed with depression and anxiety on medications. He often misses work but has kept his job for ten years.  He has talked of suicide in the distant past.  He is in a recovery group for a nonchemical addiction. He graduated college but works at a job not related to his degree. He has a habit of pulling out his hair. There has been significant family stress over the years.  He lives alone but fairly near me.  He tends to have clutter, though not dirt at home.  He tends to isolate when not doing well and is not impulsive - opposite.  He sees a therapist.  Could my son have BPD or maybe PTSD?  Thanks.

[Bestill]

I am presently sponsoring a lady with newly diagnosed BPD and have been reading a lot.  I have an adult child diagnosed with depression and anxiety on medications. He often misses work but has kept his job for ten years.  He has talked of suicide in the distant past.  He is in a recovery group for a nonchemical addiction. He graduated college but works at a job not related to his degree. He has a habit of pulling out his hair. There has been significant family stress over the years.  He lives alone but fairly near me.  He tends to have clutter, though not dirt at home.  He tends to isolate when not doing well and is not impulsive - opposite.  He sees a therapist.  Could my son have BPD or maybe PTSD?  Thanks.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Crumbling]

Hi, Bestill,

Welcome to the BPD Family!

Having someone in your life with BPD can be a huge struggle.  It can be very confusing and frustrating.  I've been married for ten years and just over a year ago he was diagnosed with BPD.  This site has been a lifeline for me since then, and I hope, and believe, it can help you too.

It sounds like you would fit well on the Parenting Board.  Feel free to post any questions you have.  Lots of people on here have people in their lives that have not had a formal diagnosis for BPD, but are here because the tools and support help.  I'm glad you found us.  

We can't help you diagnose your son, but we can help you through difficult times by being a listening ear, and offering up possible solutions or tools that have helped us.  We are all just amateurs, lending each other a helping hand.  

I am curious about how you 'sponsor a lady with BPD'.  Is it through a support group, your work?  You don't have to answer these questions, only talk about what your compelled to discuss.  But if she is seeking therapy, then perhaps there is an opportunity there for you to learn from her as well.  Just food for thought.

I found a video on this site for parents, titled 'Adolescence and BPD'.  It's linked below here.  

I hope it helps you sort things out with your son.  There is so much more you can explore and read on this site, too.  The links on the side bar, in the Parenting Board are a great place to begin.

https://bpdfamily.org/2013/05/bpdfamily.html


Thanks again for sharing,

Crumbsy

[livednlearned]

Hi Bestill,

I wanted to join Crumbling in welcoming you to the site, and to let you know that you have found the best place in the world for understanding, compassion and education.

I wonder too if my son has BPD traits. He is being treated for depression/anxiety (he's 13). His suicidal ideation goes back to age 8, and even though there is no formal diagnosis, I find that the skills and education here has helped me a lot.

How are things between you and your son right now? Does he seem to want help? What aspects of his behavior do you find most difficult to deal with?

Please tell us more when you're comfortable doing so, and check with us to let us know how things are going for you.

LnL

[Bestill]

Someone asked how do I sponsor someone with BPD.  I was sponsoring this person with love and relationship addiction, who had a breakup, and subsequently began to have BPD manifestations and deteriorated.  She was encouraged to see a therapist who diagnosed her and she is now in a treatment center.  I came to this site to learn more  ... .