hectic schedule

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

I was wondering if anyone else's pwBPD had hectic schedules. Mine was almost maniac, meeting one person after another, exercising a lot, doing classes, working etc. Then, after some weeks of this, she would just be sick and in bed for three days.

Anyone experienced anything like? 

[maric]

I was wondering if anyone else's pwBPD had hectic schedules. Mine was almost maniac, meeting one person after another, exercising a lot, doing classes, working etc. Then, after some weeks of this, she would just be sick and in bed for three days.

Anyone experienced anything like? 

[Deeno02]

I was wondering if anyone else's pwBPD had hectic schedules. Mine was almost maniac, meeting one person after another, exercising a lot, doing classes, working etc. Then, after some weeks of this, she would just be sick and in bed for three days.

Anyone experienced anything like?  

yep. She had 5 kids, 2 in club soccer or travel, 1 in football, 1 in volleyball, she coached volleyball for both club and HS, played recreationally, gave private VB lessons, most weekends spent at VB tournament's in which she came home late, but i was expected to make time for her. "You never spend enough time with me" or "treat me special or lose me" were her battle crys. I never new what her schedule was like, but i was expected to be around. I did thd best i could, seeing her when I could, kid birthday parties at 8-9 pm, i dont miss the chaos. Then toss in the xanax popping and fibromyalgia and anxiety and anger at her ex husband, whom she stalked on FB and Instagram and b___ed at me about all the time. What the heck... .

Oh, and I helped like a big dog taking them back and forth to help the woman i loved only (on top of my own kids schedules) to be slowly cut out as she devalued me and hurt me my telling me that she felt like i thought her and the kids were pains in the asses. That hurt me badly as i loved them like i loved my own kids. Yet I asked everyday what i could do to help and was told by her"I got it". Finally I stopped asking, and then she would go on about this schedulde or that schedule and how she was going to get this one here or there. She was baiting me. If i said i would help, i would get the I got it. If i didnt ask, i didnt care about her. Perfect trap. I was so beat down by then, I was hanging on by my nails, hoping things would be ok.

[antelope]

mine claimed to have a hectic schedule, working late, extra work duties, tutoring, etc.

in retrospect, I think like with everything else, she was lying about all that too, and was spending that time cheating on me, compulsively shopping, and various eating disordered behavior... .

[parisian]

Yes maric, mine had a very very busy social schedule. Some weeks it wore me out but mostly I was just slotted in between drinking and other friends. There were drinks with friends multiple times during the week (so drunk several times a week), coffee with friends, lunches with friends, movies with friends, gallery visits, other events, music concerts, dinners with friends. Saturday was markets, lunch out. If she had nothing planned on a Saturday night sometimes we would go out for dinner and then drinks afterwards. Friday night was regularly drinks after work (another regular occassion to get drunk). Every few months a trip to a different city and another hectic weekend catching up with people and going to events. Once a year or every second year, a trip overseas. Everything posted to facebook. The person she was when she was out, was the person I fell in love with - energetic, charming, engaging, witty. At home, she was quiet, insular, serious and BPD-ish.

About once a month, especially if it had been a really full on week, there was a complete crash on the weekend - staying home watching movies in pjs.

It was annoying to have to ask each week what she was doing on the weekend to see where I could fit in. That said, she did like to see me (or so she said), and we would usually spend a couple of nights a week together just watching tv. That way she didn't have to talk about anything meaningful of course   

I once asked if she felt she could stay home by herself or needed to have company and I got a defensive response.  I don't think she actually enjoyed spending much time alone, but regularly had to have some time out to cope with the overstimulation and having to be that other person. That's what it felt like anyway.

[Popcorn71]

My ex was always in a rush. He would agree to meet people or do things when he knew he wouldn't have time.  He could never have a day at home doing nothing.