My beautiful daughter of 41.

[Frautdad]

So struggling with abusive WhatsApp messages.

I struggle to ignore them, struggle to reply and just become miserable and depressed.

Its all so unnecessary and totally illogical.

:-(

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Swimmy55]

Hi,
We are here for you.  It  makes one heartsick to have a BPD adult child.  It appears she does not live with you .  What is necessary is for us to realize we matter as much as our children.  You are doing well in reading up on BPD and educating yourself.  Are you doing anything for you such as hobbies, exercise, etc? You are amongst kindred spirits here.

[Ione]

I am so sorry you are going through this, but please know you are not alone!  I too have a daughter, age 34, that sends very ugly texts and emails not only to our immediate family, but to my entire family.  She has told me to "f" off and leave them the "f" alone so many times that I have lost count.   She has made horrible accusations about me and even texted my husband, son and me "you suck go kill yourself."  These are very hard times and I too struggle.  She is keeping our two grandchildren from seeing or speaking to us and there is no telling what she is saying to them. 

You are right - it is very unnecessary and totally illogical. 

I wish there was a magic answer, I would stand in line for hours/days/weeks to get it. 

As Swimmy55 said, we matter too and we have to keep telling ourselves that through all of this. 

You are not alone!