Boundaries are how we communicate our values to others. A boundary defines the scope of our independent core values. It is the fault line on a tennis court - everything inside the fault line is playable. With boundaries, everything inside the boundary is consistent with our value.
Setting Boundaries and Setting LimitsBoundaries in a really simple term mean to keep the good stuff in and the bad stuff out. They are defined as your core values or living by your core values. For example in this context after a bad break up and being mistreated you can start to assert harsher sets of rules on yourself to give yourself distance and time to essentially heal your wounds quicker.
You know that she’s not going to have your welfare in your best interest that’s up to you to defend. You probably felt guilty or sad in the past with your expwBPD or another gf and caved in. A lot of members here had bad boundaries or floating boundaries our exes knew that if they pushed eventually we’d give in to whatever demand or desire.
She’s a big girl she can take care of herself. A boundary for now would be I’m not going to answer back a text, email etc because I want to set a hard limit and take care of my own emotional needs by protecting myself from someone that’s displayed bad behaviors to me time and time again.