Needing Support and Understanding from Other parents

[txmom737]

Hi, I have a 13yr old daughter with BPD.  She was diagnosed about 2 years ago and has been in therapy since she was 4.5yrs old.  I also have a son who is 10yrs old with Autism (didn't speak until I got with a Behavior Therapist when he was close to 3yrs, as he would bang his head and scream ALL DAY LONG over EVERYTHING).  Got divorced from their father when they were 5 & 8 yrs old, and he has been diagnosed with Narcisstic Personality Disorder.  I had to learn that during 1.5yrs of marriage counseling. So I've been remarried now for 2yrs and my husband is wonderful, but feels lost and scared (as I do) when dealing with my daughter.  She has been seeing a Child Psychiatrist since she was 9yrs old and in DBT since she was 11yrs old.  However, even though I'm doing EXACTLY what all the books and specialists say to do, it IS TOUGH.  Every time my daughter goes to her dad's house on the weekends she is gets into trouble on the Internet and I find out about it at my house since she leaves my IPAD logged in.  Very frustrating and exhausting when you can't rely on the child's other bio parent to back you up.  I'm here looking from support from other parents who live this hell on a daily basis also.  I know how important and useful the support from the Autism Group was for me in those early years, now I need it for BPD and there is nothing locally or in person.  So I'm going to try online since it's my only option.  I look forward to hearing from others and sharing stories so that I don't feel so alone in this messed up journey.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[twojaybirds]

Welcome

I am glad you found us.  This board is what has kept me afloat for many years now.

There are parents like you and awesome resources. Although it sounds like you are good with resources and therapy, there is no exact answer.

Exhausting is a great word and very true.  Are you finding time to rejuvenate yourself and your marriage?

[txmom737]

Thanks for replying!  I do try to make time for myself and my marriage, but it is tough finding a balance with working full-time at a stressful job.  It always ends up that my daughter and her behaviors take up 99% of my free time.  I'm learning which battles to pick, as some are pointless.  Right now it's trying to keep her safe, as she wants lots of attention from other unknown people on the internet.  I think technology is great, but not for kids like her.  How old is your child? Thanks for responding. 

[SoSoSoTired]

I'm glad you're here.  Having kids with special needs is very difficult and lonely.  A support group helps.

I'm sorry your ex-husband isn't following a safe plan with your daughter's Internet usage at his home. That's scary.