GoingBack2OC
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Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Posts: 228
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« on: April 19, 2016, 04:48:44 AM » |
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She does exactly the opposite of what I want, or need... .What are your thoughts on this besides "she's bad news".
It's pretty much over. It is over. It is. But after 12 Days of NC, all her lies, deception, silent treatment for days, weeks, going on for years together... .
I broke NC. Day 12.
Nothing crazy, a few I'm thinking of you texts. Perhaps a dozen over a few days (some were continuous/connected). Nothing mean. Apologies.
I had asked her weeks ago, during silent treatment time... .where she would ignore me for days, weeks, like punishment. It destroyed me.
I begged her in texts to block me, and again before I finally stopped texting, trying, please just block me. Why do you not say a thing, but don't block me? If you want nothing of me, don't want me, my love, why not just block my texts and number?
Finally yesterday, after I had broken NC, I sent a final text. It said basically:
I know I said please block me. But really Im glad you didnt. Please dont. I know this may sound strange, but even though you never reply, I find some solace just talking to you, and telling you how I feel. Theres things I can't talk to anyone about, but I can tell you. I know even though you feel you can't respond. I hope, you hear me. I think you can hear me. Thank you for listening.
I sent a text 5 minutes later simply: Really, thank you.
I had been blocked.
SOO. The reason I sent Text 1: Saying thank you for not blocking even though I asked, I really dont want that. I had begged her to, never understood why she didnt. I never got that. Why not block if I'm texting and she has no interest in talking to me ever... .
Boggled, I sent Text 1, to simply test the reasoning. I had asked her so many times to block me. She never did. For weeks I asked. Then NC.
I sent maybe a dozen texts after breaking NC over 4 days.
Within minutes of my last text, saying please dont block me... .she blocks me.
It's like reverse psychology. She does the opposite. Like the scene in Roger Rabbit where the cop is trying to get Roger to drink whisky. Roger states, "I don't want it", cop responds "you do!". Back and forth they go, I dont... .you do... .I dont! You do! A pause. The cop switches: You don't! Then Roger: I do!
It feels that crazy. Like I'm dealing with a cartoon character, or small child. Reverse psychology.
I guess after that I had sort of a wake up call as to how crazy she is. My final text simply said, I meant everything I said, I care a lot about you, I miss you, but whatever you do, do not come over and do my laundry.
I know immature... .but humor is how I cope with life's hard times.
Sigh... .
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