My exBPD/NPD DOES have a new girlfriend and I'm losing it...

[Depression = 72% of members]

Oh Boy!

The pit in my stomach, I want to puke!

It's confirmed!

Just saw a post of a mutual friend and yep, my exBPD has another girlfriend.  Just like that! Not even a month later and BOOM!

"They're so in love... .  "

I'm shaking, wish to puke and just keep shaking my head in belief/disbelief.

My thoughts are: What if my exBPD isn't BPD (w/NPD traits) and I really was a horrible person? How can that be? I know I'm not!

Gross, she's so nasty. I can't believe it. It's really over. Puke, disgust. Over it. Moron, AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!

This new GF is posting comments that she loves my ex BPD and all the world to see it and everyone is thinking it's so damn cute, blah blah... .  

I mean, shouldn't that be questioned?

OK, must calm down... .  

Completely nauseous. When WILL THIS END?

I mean, I know I am over it, I know I am better off without her but shi*!

Why the hell is this upsetting me so much!

:'(

[MakeItHappen]

Oh Boy!

The pit in my stomach, I want to puke!

It's confirmed!

Just saw a post of a mutual friend and yep, my exBPD has another girlfriend.  Just like that! Not even a month later and BOOM!

"They're so in love... .  "

I'm shaking, wish to puke and just keep shaking my head in belief/disbelief.

My thoughts are: What if my exBPD isn't BPD (w/NPD traits) and I really was a horrible person? How can that be? I know I'm not!

Gross, she's so nasty. I can't believe it. It's really over. Puke, disgust. Over it. Moron, AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!

This new GF is posting comments that she loves my ex BPD and all the world to see it and everyone is thinking it's so damn cute, blah blah... .  

I mean, shouldn't that be questioned?

OK, must calm down... .  

Completely nauseous. When WILL THIS END?

I mean, I know I am over it, I know I am better off without her but shi*!

Why the hell is this upsetting me so much!

:'(

[crashintome]

It hit me like a ton of bricks at first, too.

All I can tell you is my experience.  In September, my ex left me for this new girl.  They were in love.  The whole 9 yards.

In December, it was over.  She wanted me back.  Next day, she's back with the new girl.  In January, they are over.  Next day, she is back with the ex.  Two weeks later, they are done.  She wants me back.  Now, a month later, they are in love again and I'm yesterday's news.

Just keep in mind how it was at the beginning.  Everything was rainbows and unicorns crapping glitter.  It will wear out.

But I can still empathize with how you are feeling.

[MakeItHappen]

It hit me like a ton of bricks at first, too.

All I can tell you is my experience.  In September, my ex left me for this new girl.  They were in love.  The whole 9 yards.

In December, it was over.  She wanted me back.  Next day, she's back with the new girl.  In January, they are over.  Next day, she is back with the ex.  Two weeks later, they are done.  She wants me back.  Now, a month later, they are in love again and I'm yesterday's news.

Just keep in mind how it was at the beginning.  Everything was rainbows and unicorns crapping glitter.  It will wear out.

But I can still empathize with how you are feeling.

THANKS crash! You summed it up well. For whatever reason, I am fearful and sad that I don't think she'll ever reach back out to me... .  Almost as if, I caught her at her game and she knows it. I guess, there is comfort in that!

[crashintome]

I'm in this place where I'm so torn about the possibility of the next recycle.

On one hand:  I'm in love with her.  I admit it.  I don't know if its the farce or the real her that I love, but no doubt its love.  I want her to want me.  I want her to come back.

On the other hand:  I know it won't end well.  I know I will end up broken and hurt again, so I hope she works it out with this new girl so I can eventually stop aching from all of this.

[daze]

I mean, I know I am over it, I know I am better off without her but shi*!

Why the hell is this upsetting me so much!

Maybe it hurts your feelings?  It would hurt my feelings for my pwBPD to jump into another relationship so quickly and be "in love."  I would probably feel like throwing up too.

[tut-uncommon]

Makeithappen,

Same here 

She's already posting stuff!   I was the sucker. Now she's replaced me with a new "flavor of the month"

Hurts like hell

I have some advice- Please get professional help if at all possible. I had to.

Peace and Prayers

Tut

[krista8521]

 :'( I am sorry to hear you are feelings these crappy emotions. I would start with thinking what you will do when the recycle faze comes around. It will not take long as you read from the others.

I would try to take the pain in one big gulp, instead of these on again off again spurts that seem to go on.

Try to at least get out with friends and socialize, maybe meet some other people to help support you through these times.

ugh... it really bothers me to hear of anothers sadness or horrible emotions they have to cope with, I wish I could wave a wand and take that misery away, but obvious no one can except time.

Stay on here and get as much support as you can, educate yourself as much as you can on BPD the more you learn, the easier it is to understand why these things have to happen.

God Bless~

[MakeItHappen]

:'( I am sorry to hear you are feelings these crappy emotions. I would start with thinking what you will do when the recycle faze comes around. It will not take long as you read from the others.

I would try to take the pain in one big gulp, instead of these on again off again spurts that seem to go on.

Try to at least get out with friends and socialize, maybe meet some other people to help support you through these times.

ugh... it really bothers me to hear of anothers sadness or horrible emotions they have to cope with, I wish I could wave a wand and take that misery away, but obvious no one can except time.

Stay on here and get as much support as you can, educate yourself as much as you can on BPD the more you learn, the easier it is to understand why these things have to happen.

God Bless~

You are so kind Krista, thank you.

In a weird way, I have this fear that I won't get recycled, which is for the best, I know. Then again, if I don't, what the hell happened?

[crashintome]

In a weird way, I have this fear that I won't get recycled, which is for the best, I know. Then again, if I don't, what the hell happened?

I had this mindframe every single time.  I always thought, "This is it.  This is the end." but she always came back.

Please be prepared for it.  When it takes you off guard, you are so foolish. 

That's the main goal of my time here.  I need to make sense of it all in my head.  I need to get myself to a place where I can say that I'm honestly 100% done.  It may not be what I want right now, but I know it's what I need.

[Suzn]

Hello MakeItHappen

I'm really sorry this happened.   Breakups are so hard. First of all --breath--. I know how much this hurts right now. Your exgf will go through the same scenario with the next person she is with, and the next, and the next...

Have you had a chance to read this yet? It explains what happened very well.

How a Borderline Personality Disorder Love Relationship Evolves

[boatman]

Hi MakeitHappen-

I'm sorry you are going through this. I can relate. I don't think my ex has moved on yet, though she cut off communication with me yesterday, so who knows what's going on now. I convinced myself that I'm different from the guys of her past because I've known her for so long, but if she replaces me anytime soon I know how worthless I will feel.

What are you doing to cope with this painful situation? Do you find yourself ruminating and worrying about it? I know I do.

[krista8521]

I know everyone thinks that they will be the percent that it will/will not happen to them.

It's like watching a talk show and they say for 99% of people this is usually what happens, and you think "no, I am that unique, weird one who it will not happen like that with.

I can tell by this hot and heavy garbage thats posted on line it will not last long, usually when people roll into these kinda relationships, they roll out of them just as fast as they entered.

BPD's can be very emotionally immature and selfish, I honestly think some of this posting online was a direct jab at you to hurt you or invoke a reaction. I would give none.

My Husband did something close to this to me, and like you I believed with all my heart they would marry and on and on, it was incredibly painful. But like you, I was told the same thing on here and yes it lasted less then a month and he was back.

I think once they get a taste of reality it all falls apart, like my husband is really selfish, inconsiderate, a basic f-up for a partner. She probably saw this after a short time and ran for the hills.

People with this disorder cant hide it for long and anyone with common sense splits.

But, it was still living hell for me, after awhile you get mad, not hurt,thats when I stopped taking calls from him or being around when he stopped in. Thats when he woke up, when he saw that I was moving on and he was about to be out for ever.

I was like a emotional vampire on here for support, thats one of the only things that got me through this. So use this board when ever you feel weak or like you are going to loose it, thats what everyone is here for.

I also read articles about BPDs and the stormy relationships, the fazes it goes through, seriously you can read them and its like reading your horoscope, its exactly how it plays out.BPD'S can be so predictable its uncanny.

****Suzn posted the article I think I had read, and like I said it's a road map to what will happen.