Packed and going. Nothing from dd since my last post. Keeping my emtions

[somuchlove]

Any advice is much appreciated.  Thanks.

We have decided to go visit gkids and dd and all else that is going on.  I have text dd 4 times and left message because I need info before we get there but nothing from her.  That is ok.  If she choses to do that I can't make her talk to me.  I really have yet to figure out what she is mad at me for.  Other than I am not fixing everything.  You know she had called about 3 months ago wanting to come her,  all sweet, wanting my help. etc. 

We have a room ( never had to get a room before) they have room and so not sure what we are walking into.  I don't know, could dd set it up so we have to visit with ex. and then continue to tell us, see everyone hates me,  I haven't done anything wrong but I guess I don't deserve anything.  You talk to ex but not me.  I am going to spend the time on the plane going through what I can and cannot say.  I will also leave much time for thinking about the wonderful time it will be with gkids.  Oh I can't wait for their hugs and sillyness.  And gbaby is walking and looks so sweet in her pictures.   

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[lbjnltx]

I pray your trip is filled with many good times with the gkids!

Accept what you cannot change and make the most of any opportunity you have to give and receive love.

 

lbj

[vivekananda]

ditto.

forgo your worries and try for good times. You have done homework, be confident in the goodness of your heart.

I hope you have a wonderful time with the grandkids. I hope your dd isn't nasty - but too bad if she is.

Cheers,

Vivek    

ps sorry this is late, I only just found it... .  

[swampped]

A belated bon voyage     from me too, somuchlove. Somehow I find that grandchildren take a lot of the pain away, and I hope you can enjoy every minute with your little ones.  Know that your dd also appreciates the effort and time you are taking with them, even if she cannot express that.  For dh and me, staying in a motel is worth every penny, as we can escape the problem when we are not contributing to the solution.  And I find dh is much more tolerant of the visits when he gets them in small chunks.  Most of the time,  me too!       I'll be sending good thoughts your way, and wishes for a wonderful visit.        Swampped

[qcarolr]

somuchlove - when are you going, or have you already gone?  Sorry I missed your post - last week was a tough one for me.

I will be trying to imagine you covered in the love of all your gkids - laughter and giggles, hugs and kisses. Hope you are able to take them out on some adventures - is it warm where your D lives?

Try to wait for cues from your D - it is so tempting to bring up your worries. Hope you can put them aside and treat this as a holiday. Maybe if your dh can attend to the kids in some way, you can offer to get coffee out with your D? Or would this be troublesome?

You know what to do and say in your heart - so think with your heart and feel with your mind. Most of all find some joy.

qcr