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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: Crazy in court - I'm a little relieved  (Read 488 times)
rogerroger
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
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« on: July 09, 2013, 07:49:44 PM »

Yesterday was a pretrial and I had been having mixed feelings. On the one hand, x2b has been mostly successful in getting herself together: new job, stopped drinking (apparently), and no recent run-ins with the police. I was almost convinced she would be at least somewhat reasonable, given the communications coming through her attorney. On the other hand, I was afraid that all this was just a facade she was keeping up for the purpose of trying to improve her position regarding child custody.

In court, she channeled her inner drama queen. She snorted loudly and derisively in response to statements made by my attorney, drawing several warnings from her own attorney. She attempted to interrupt by attorney to contest various statements, drawing a warning from the judge. She broke into tears at the judgment that the existing custody arrangement was not to be modified at this time, and cried out "My kids are so little and all they want is their mommy!" She all but called the GAL incompetent because the GAL recommended no change in the existing arrangement, saying "they want to be with their mommy! Why hasn't the GAL asked what they want? They want to be with me!" At one point when her attorney was stating that they contested one point about division of some property, she smiled a big evil "I told you I would try to screw you on this" smile and nodded at me. I think only the court reporter saw it, however. The property in question is clearly separate (it's an inheritance), and the only reason she won't accept it is that she knows it is important to me.

In short, I think a few major cracks appeared in the facade. I had been especially worried that she has been able to fool the GAL, but I have to say I'm a lot less worried about that after today.
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hell0kitty
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« Reply #1 on: July 14, 2013, 09:41:15 AM »

That is how our BPDex was in the last hearing. She cried and cried and did the evil smile thing when her attorney said something she liked and looked at my BF, and she also scoffed and huffed loudly while he was giving his statement and rolled her eyes a lot.  Even with an attorney, it is hard to hide the crazy.  I ended up feeling bad for her attorney actually, he seems like an OK guy.
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