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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: Should this be communicated to the GaL?  (Read 369 times)
papawapa
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 236


« on: September 04, 2013, 05:01:11 AM »

The first thing is that the ex's pattern of unstable relationships has continued. Monday night she was fighting with the replacement and called 911 on him. Should I or do I need to communicate this to the GaL or will she find out on her own?


The second thing is that the temporary order states that both parents shall abstain from using alcohol and drugs. I have been sober since we went to court. She has continued to use and drink regularly. The kids had their first visit with their mom a couple weeks ago. Ex has been calling the GaL asking to see them again. Ex did her drug/alcohol assessment and the report should be in the GaL's hands by now. Unless she completely snowballed the assessor she should be required to take random drug tests like I am. I think she should have to pass a drug test before she should be able to see the kids again. Should I communicate this to the GaL?
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ForeverDad
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: separated 2005 then divorced
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You can't reason with the Voice of Unreason...


« Reply #1 on: September 04, 2013, 10:34:56 AM »

It's highly doubtful ex would tell the GAL.  She probably wouldn't want GAL to know about the incident since it could reflect poorly on her home environment.  How would the GAL find out except from you?  You have to point the GAL in the right direction.

Are you able to see if you can request a copy of the 911 call or subsequent police report?  Or at least narrow the time frame down so the GAL can request it if so inclined?
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frustrated b/f
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Posts: 147


« Reply #2 on: September 04, 2013, 11:23:23 AM »

Document, and keep records of everything!
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papawapa
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 236


« Reply #3 on: September 04, 2013, 07:46:33 PM »

I emailed the GaL and told her I talked to the ex's mother and heard there was "some sort of domestic" and the ex called 911.
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