Daughter sexually abused/groomed and has BPD

[BPD mom]

My first post.

My daughter was sexually abused/groomed from the ages of 11-13.  She is now 17.  She has done substance abuse, self harming, suicide.  She developed epilepsy as a result and has missed out on her teenage years.  I love her to bits, but the manipulate and never knowing what her mood/ or who she will be or react is draining to say the least. And oh the lies

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[DreamFlyer99]

hi BPD mom and 

I just wanted to jump in and say hi while you're still online, and say that you've found the perfect place for support and information for your very tough situation. We have many members with children who have BPD traits and know how difficult that relationship is, and there's loads of info and tools on ways to deal with the pwBPD (person with BPD)'s outbursts and arguments and all that feels so manipulative.

I know with my husband with BPD traits, he'll react to things I say or do like I'm a playground bully and then defend defend defend by pushing pushing pushing and it made me nuts! But i'm learning how to not push those triggers and how to have better boundaries and how to communicate better, so things have improved some.

Does she live with you currently? Do you have any support from your family or friends so you have someone to talk to about it all? Where's her father now?

She's definitely a hurting girl, and when my uBPDh (undiagnosed BPD husband) is hurting he's like a bear with a burr in his paw. It's a hard way for both them and us to live.

Glad you found us!

[lbjnltx]

Hello BPD mom,

So very glad that you are here and telling us about your daughter.  It sounds like she has some very deep wounds to live with.  Have you been able to get her into therapy to deal with these wounds?

I also have a daughter 17 yrs old (well almost, birthday next month).  She was dx w emerging BPD at age 12.  So, I can understand some of the drain on you as a parent.

We are here to listen, support, and help you.

lbjnltx