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Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits. Practicing lawyer, Senior Family Mediator, and former Licensed Clinical Social Worker with twelve years’ experience and an expert on navigating the Family Court process.
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Author Topic: What do I do now? :(  (Read 350 times)
sadinnc98
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 256



« on: October 10, 2013, 01:26:35 PM »

I don't even know where to post this or what forum I belong in because i change daily on what I want to do.  Basically things have been going very well with some occasional little issues, but better for a few weeks mow. Well last night we were having sex and it was dark and we had a few drinks. I don't know if I hit him with my head (likely) or we bumped, but we hit hard during sex and his nose is possibly broken. It looks bad-it has a big bruise on the bridge and a red bump.  Now he won't talk to me, ignoring me, etc... .I don't understand. Does he think I did this intentionally? I apologized a bunch of times, offered to bring him lunch, etc...  I am a wreck over this. What do I do?
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patientandclear
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: single
Posts: 2785



« Reply #1 on: October 10, 2013, 07:14:36 PM »

Make clear (as you probably have) that you are around and available, not upset yourself by whatever odd thing happened resulting in the nose injury ... .and let him sort himself out.

Maybe he had a fantasy vision of how getting back together was going to be, then this happened, now he feels it was "ruined." Maybe something else we cannot even guess at.

Don't panic & make a big deal out of him needing some space.  It is not unusual & it does not indicate that he is gone for good.  The intimacy is probably also scary.

It seems that many pwBPD need an astonishing amount of space.  Astonishing.  Take how much space you think they might need, and multiply by 10.  It doesn't mean anything is necessarily "wrong," except that they have BPD.
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Aussie0zborn
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 803



« Reply #2 on: October 11, 2013, 06:45:49 AM »

I would offer to drive him to the hospital. If he says no, give him his space and he'll go when he is good and ready.

If his nose is broken, he definitley needs medical attention. I broke my nose as a kid without knowing it. At 16 I needed an operation to breathe properly which was unsuccesful.
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