how do I get My daughter back to school

[bubby827]

In November she was in the hospital two times.  The school kicked her out until she was more stable.  She went the principal and said people were talking about her.  And of course they did not say what she heard.  Daughter told him she wanted to hurt herself or them and now he will not let her back in until he talks to her councilor.  She was just diagnosed with BPD and now we are in the process of getting her some DBT therapist.  The county mental health office has the only one in the area.  She has until the end of January to get it together or she will not be permitted to come back.

I take her in at 7 to make up tests and turn in work.   Which she does about half of the time.  I just do not know what to do.

She is bipolar and BPD and there is the program we are trying to get her in with a crisis management with county mental health but I still have not heard if we qualify. 

I can not leave her alone because I can not trust her.  She is 17.  At times I feel like she is a baby again and someone has to be with her at all times.  I am so frustrated.   I cry every single day. My body aches from worry.  ADVICE PLEASE

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[BioAdoptMom3]

Since you only have until January I would make sure you have a psychiatrist in the same building as her therapist or take her to her own doctor as well.  You said she was just diagnosed and most people with BPD have some level of anxiety and depression.  Getting her on some medication may be very helpful.  She will still need intense therapy, but the medication can make things so much more bearable!  It may take some time to find the right one, right dosage or right combination of meds.  For our DD a combination of Prozac and Abilify is a godsend!  If you can get her on meds soon, you might contact the school, let them know what is going on and see if you can get an extension.  If they prescribe an anti-depressant/anxiety drug it will probably take at least a good three weeks to begin to have an effect!   

[bubby827]

she is also bipolar is on Prozac, abilify, welbutrin, stratira  and a new med for sleep

[bubby827]

she has been on these meds since July

[jellibeans]

By law it is the responsiblity of your school district to educate your child. If they are not allowing her to attend they need to send a teacher to your home. I would check into your rights and hire a lawyer if neccessary. This is totally illegal what they are doing. What state are you in?

[bubby827]

We are in Michigan... .She attends a private Catholic School... apparently they are not bound by the laws that what they told me

[jaynebrain]

I am so sorry to hear of your struggle.  I have been there with my daughter too.  My heart breaks for you both.  My daughter's school district has something called Home & Hospital.  I had to ask about it but it was a great help.  She withdrew form High School and registered under the Independent Study program.  An assigned teacher came to our home on the days that my daughter was able to function.  She would stay for an hour or so and just talk to her about what she had read or take a walk with her and ask her vocab words.  so much of school is busy work and this way there was not as much pressure on my student to complete written assignments, but she was able to show that she understood what she read by her conversations.  The teacher gave her assignments like putting together a resume, posters of her dream life - all things that supported the therapy she was in.  It was a huge blessing.  It also gave me an hour off!

Thinking good thoughts for you in this fight!

[crumblingdad]

 I believe it is true that the catholic school doesn't have to provide anything being a private school.  However, if she gets kicked out of the private school you could then go to the public school system and request to have an IEP established and at that point the public school system by law must make sure they can provide adequate education for her given her diagnosis.


There's a whole bunch of info on the IEP process if you get to that somewhere on this board (I think) and I'm drawing a blank in finding it to point you there.

Maybe someone else will see this and provide some direction where it is. Or maybe I'm losing my mind and saw those resources somewhere outside this board.

[Rapt Reader]

Hi, bubby827, and  

The links below may be the ones that crumblingdad had seen, and they should have the information you are looking for:

504 plan/IEP -- how to navigate the school system

https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=198796

Educational Accommodations for Students with BPD

https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=168656

I truly hope this helps... .For more information on everything you need to know to help yourself help your daughter, have you checked out the TOOLS and THE LESSONS to the right-hand side of this page? Especially Lesson #5, where the above link was taken from. Please know that we are here to help you through this  

[jellibeans]

bubbly

HOw is it going with you dd? Did you pull her for the private school? Please let us know how you are doing... .I hoping things have turned around for you all...

[bubby827]

We have been approved for a special county mental health program that will help us with crisis prevention and they are suppose to help with school.  So tomorrow is the day we go to the meeting to find out how they help us.  I am praying it will meet all our needs.  they are suppose to help with school.  I got permission to bring her to band on Fri and Mon, Tue and the band concert on Tuesday night.  SO I am hopeful for a turn around.  I am already thanking God for our Christmas miracle. I am very hopeful.  we will find out more at our meeting tomorrow afternoon.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Rapt Reader]

Oh, bubby827, that sounds very promising! I'm very glad that you are finding resources that should help you. I'm just so happy for you 

Can you let us know how it works out after your meeting tomorrow?

Your situation and the ways you are finding solutions will be very educational for other members, and can help other parents of kids with similar circumstances.

And besides... .We are all pulling for you, and hope things go great 

Good luck!   

[bubby827]

The meeting was some what confusing.  First we  will be assigned a councilor that will either come to the house or we will go to county Mental Health.  Either is fine with us.  They also have a MUTT program that I am not sure I really understand it is a support for kids having a brake down.  The problem with the councilor is she will be taking time off for the holidays... .so we are kind of in need of help now to get her skills to get back to school... .She was to go to band today but she had a panic attack so I did not send her.  We did go meet with the Math teacher to prepare for a test on Monday.  Tonight we are taking her to a concert at the school and maybe that will help with kids that are there to support her. 

I am doing my best to get as much help for her as  I can ... .I ordered three workbooks that will be here Monday.  I feel like an idiot.  Because I really do not know how to help her.  I want her to finish school but the Mother in me also wants to protect her. 

I emailed the lady in charge of the program we are getting and hopefully she will answer me soon and I can get an update.  This program is covered by a special Grant the County Mental Health received.  Also one weird thing is they have two of the best physciatrist in the country but it is via skype.  what are your thinking of this.

[Dee Dee]

Hi Bubby

I am new but similar situation my daughter went to a catholic school her final year last year go to the principal and ask him to pray with you The principal of my daughters school was and is truly a shepherd he got her through based on her previous school record never give up I pray for miracles for you they do happen   

[jellibeans]

dee dee

I am just checking in with you... . sorry I have been so sick with the flu but I have been wondering now that the hoildays are over has anyone been able to help your family? Please update when you can.