Not right now but I have in the past. Its how it is when you've been hurt. Your emotions are a real part of your being that, like everything else, has the potential to be injured, damaged, or broken.
What I'd say is best is to break off your new relationship right now and get cozy with a stack of self-help books. Also include a journal. The people you need in your life right now are counselors, support groups, and God (or Higher Power). While you're at it, get physically active with regular exercise. When you're ready, start volunteering. All of these are important tools for your healing and growth.
It's important to come to understand yourself, your past, your emotions and attachments, and learn to get healthy before involving yourself in another relationship.
I appreciate what you said here, and I think your post is on the right board. I do often wonder if there is something about me that craves the chaos. the answer is probably yes.
I also wonder whether I've picked up on some of my ex's behaviors and fears (god I hope not). my T has said that its been only a year and that my brain is still somewhat wired to the chaos that was my life.
God knows I dont want to cause anyone any pain. I do hope that my current relationship continues as it feels very different than what I've had before.
