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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: She would describe herself with labels in her facebook profile  (Read 339 times)
freedom33
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Single
Posts: 542



« on: September 02, 2014, 05:00:39 AM »

Can you please share examples where your pwBPD would exhibit N traits.

For example mine would say things like 'I deserve this and I deserve that e.g. a better boyfriend'. Or 'I am so proud of this with such an entitlement (and hidden rage). She would describe herself with labels in her facebook profile e.g. she would start doing a workshop in something say pottery and after doing a few pots over the course of months she would describe herself as a potter in her profile in addition to 6 other similar things. Or she would take videos and create home videos with her phone and she would describe herseft as a video artist. She was artistic and had talents but I found the whole thing a bit annoying and even slightly delusional. What was your experience?
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Suspicious1
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Broken up & 'silent treatment'
Posts: 302



« Reply #1 on: September 02, 2014, 05:25:36 AM »

Funnily enough it took me ages to realise his Narc traits because, in his own words, "I am the most self-effacing person you will ever meet". Hahahahahahahahahaha. There's narcissism if ever I saw it. For someone who was self-effacing and unassuming, he had dreadful rages if he felt he was being given less than his due.

So yes, he said he had shockingly low self-esteem, which he probably did, but he was also the most vain individual I'd ever known.

His big addiction was working out, and of course he was the strongest person around. If he was lifting weights when anyone else was around he'd encourage them to try to lift them too so he could show them how much more easily he could do it. He'd wear t-shirts several times too small to show off his form. He could beat anyone in a fight apparently, and mentioned his body and his working out every day. Despite saying he hated himself and was unattractive, he was also obsessed with leagues, and whether someone was in or out of someone else's league. I despise that concept. He'd start by saying I was out of his league, his ex wife was out of his league. Then when his ex was split black he was wondering if really he was out of her league because his body was so good.

He liked to tell me how many women tried to friend him on social media and how attractive the women who were hitting on him were. I think it was a way to try to encourage me to feel privileged to be with him, but really it just drove a wedge between us.
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