Hi Mike, he was not officially diagnosed with BPD but over the 11 years we've been together his unexplainable actions only leads me to feel positive this is what he has. It has just repeated itself over and over on a daily basis and left me to think " this is just not normal". When I found out about BPD it was so relieving knowing there was an explanation for all of these bizarre behaviors and I was not crazy. He has went to a few therapist for one time visits. Never goes back. And I am seriously thinking of going to one myself because it is taking it's toll on me emotionally and physically. It is so hard focusing on this issue 24/7. I swear I have PTSD or something because of all of the over inflated emotional episodes I deal with in my daily life. Thanks for your welcome. I am glad to be here :-)
I felt relieved too when I discovered BPD, because so much that had gone on in my relationship with my uGF made sense. I was also questioning myself through the relationship, even after discovering that BPD fit her behavior and past, and even after she moved out. I think that through living with someone with BPD you start to experience in a someways what their inner turmoil might be like.
I recommend focusing on you, your emotional, mental, and physical health. I found that I contributed less to the escalation of conflict and was more empathetic as I became more centered, by focusing on my mental and physical health and emotional regulation.
The lessons on the right are a great place to start. I have found that the communication tools and depersonalization have been useful so many exchanges that I engage in throughout the days. Validation is a valuable communication tool for interacting with so many people.
