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Things I couldn't have known
Emotional Blackmail: Fear, Obligation and Guilt (FOG)
Am I the Cause of Borderline Personality Disorder?
Escaping Conflict and the Karpman Drama Triangle
I think it's Borderline Personality Disorder, but how can I know?
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Author Topic: Acceptance  (Read 507 times)
Bestill

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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Divorced.
Posts: 15



« on: October 21, 2015, 11:48:32 PM »

I haven't posted in awhile.  My adult son has not, as yet, been diagnosed with BPD.  However, he struggles with anxiety and depression and is on medication.  Even though he had FMLA, he missed so much work at a job he had for eleven years that he lost his job.  He lives alone, tends to isolate, is passive-aggressive.  Instead of finding a job that he might like and leaving the old one, he just passively lost the one he had.  Now, he is panicking.  I didn't do so well the first week, was stressed, and began to affect my health.  But since, I am working daily to let go and let God.  I try every day to stay out of his way and out of my head.  I've come to realize that even though I might think I know what is best for him, I could be wrong.  I'm believing there are solutions for his situation, but they are his to find.  But today, I have to remember that he has a place to stay, food to eat, clothes to wear, and transportation.  For that I am grateful.  .
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Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
AVR1962
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 156


« Reply #1 on: October 22, 2015, 10:38:14 AM »

We worry and care about our children no matter how old they are and what they do but they do have to find their way. You have made  good choice by concentrating on the positive that you see he has, he has to figure out the rest. You can give him positive support but he is the one that has to put one foot in front of the other and find his way. Keep your focus on you and what you enjoy in life.
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jellibeans
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 1726



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« Reply #2 on: October 22, 2015, 10:44:25 AM »

Beatlll

Your approach is prefect and I know it can be hard to tolerate our kids distress. This is something I have to work on daily. My d is 18 and I still try and solve her problems at times. Focus on yourself and your son will find a way. Is he living with you? Is he seeing a T?
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