Twilight Zone

[Billeve4957]

This is my first experience with dealing with a BP and my head is ready to blow off my shoulders.  I always felt a heaviness around her and a reluctance to be myself.  My stepson married her this past August and it has been nothing but chaos and fractured relationships ever since.  I've never seen or experienced anything like this.  She had a very dysfunctional bridal party so my daughters and I made sure she had a nice shower, rehearsal dinner and wedding.  I made the BIG mistake of telling her my feeling were hurt after she posted 121 wedding photos of everyone but my family.  Both mothers (who abandoned both of them) were in these photos.  I have paid the price ever since even though I assured her I never thought it was intentional.  She has twisted the situation, our conversations, etc. and has blown me off with the 3 attempts I made to reconnect (when I did nothing wrong in the first place!) My daughters are disgusted with her after seeing how disrespectful she treated me.  My husband and I are at swords point because he will not consider her mental illness and sugar coats situations to avoid confronting his son with the truth.  We have always been a family who can have conflicts... .but we have always sat down to reconcile so there is no "unfinished business".  I am beside myself to see how this girl can come in to the family and in 6 weeks have everyone so disconnected.  It is downright scary to be this close to a BP which is why I am educating myself as much as possible to protect myself (and my family) for the future.  I am grateful to have found this forum.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[michmom]

Welcome Billeve4957,

You are doing the right thing by working on educating yourself.  :)id you say your d in-law is diagnosed Bi-polar or Borderline Personality Disorder? How has your step son been handling this situation? What qualities does he see in her that you do not experience?