counseling

[Watermelon]

I am ready to go to family counseling. I need help. She is an adult, has other physical illnesses as well as BPD. She is now financially dependent and living at home. She is verbally abusive and refuses to hear me ask her to go to a counselor with me. What can I do?

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[lbjnltx]

Hi Watermelon  

Welcome to the Parenting Board of bpdfamily.  We are glad to have you with us!

More than anything we want our kids to want and get help.  Other more seasoned member's than myself say here "BPD is the disorder that exists to be denied".  I think that pretty much sums up where my d was in her healing.  She was able to turn this around when therapy was a requirement, when we made the decision to send her to RTC (she was a minor and I realize your d isn't) and most importantly when I was able to have a better relationship with her.

I learned to model the skills for her that I was looking for her to use.  The skills I speak of are available in the tools and lessons on the right side of the page.  The good news is that all of these skills and tools really helped me regardless of whether or not they would help my daughter I needed them to survive and thensome.  I still practice these skills with everyone in my life, not just my daughter, and I continue to benefit from them.  Because of the tools and skills I used my daughter and I were able to rebuild our relationship and we have trust between us.  When we trust someone we will listen to them and heed their advise much more than someone we don't trust.

 

What do you think?  

lbj