Need Advice on Financials and Recourse

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

Hey Everyone,

I could use any input on my options.  Here are the extreme coles notes of my situation:

- Fall 2013:  Eloped with a uBPD I had just met.  Pregnant on the wedding night (not my usual style - I knew her in High School and didn't recognize the red flags quickly enough)

- Feb. 2014:  Falsely accused/arrested of DV.  uBPDx moved from Canada to Miami while pregnant.

- Fall 2016:  uBPDx shows up high to court.  I go from 0% custody to 100% custody.

- Fall 2016:  Psych evals ordered.  My eval was normal.  uBPDx diagnosed with "most severe anxiety disorder" they've ever seen.  Terms used in report: "Anti-social behaviour", "Cognitive Distortions", "Not credible", etc.


I'm doing fine with the custody aspect of this divorce.  It's been extremely frustrating as she has a mirror of herself in a lawyer who continues to throw every bs false accusation at me and they've actually fabricated evidence and recruited a Paediatrician to lie about me under oath.  I still have 100% custody.  They've also blocked the psych eval from being submitted to evidence until 2017. 

Here's my main problem: I own a small business in Canada.  I've never paid myself more than $25,000 USD.  The company has potential to be something, but when I met this woman it was still in it's start up phase and I've just never had money to pay myself more. 

uBPDx and her lawyer started off with my income manipulated to $200,000 USD.  After a year, we've got it down to $75,000 USD.  We have a financial hearing in December where I will submit more bulletproof financial statements that will prove my income is less than $40,000. 

uBPDx has worked up 6 figures in legal fees and forensic accountant fees.  They're trying to force me to pay her bills.  The way I see it, at this point, her lawyer and accountant are pot committed.  They've got so much into this case, they have nothing to lose to try to fight me and manipulate my income to at least $75,000 so that they can hopefully recoup some of their fees.  I think they're starting to see which side of the "crazy fence" they're on and they know they're never going to get paid from her. 

So far, this divorce has cost my family close to $150,000.  And we still haven't even determined an accurate income.  The case is just dragged out longer and longer.  My first lawyer also very stupidly volunteered me to pay 80% of the costs (GAL, Medical, etc.) in a misguided attempt to manipulate the GAL. 

My new (much better) lawyer says I have 2 real options.

1)  Stop paying all the money, and move here and agree to a 50/50 split.  Then hope that uBPDx screws up more (likely), over a couple years work towards majority custody and then apply to relocate back home.

2)  Continue paying all the money, prove that I have minimal income, once the opposing side isn't getting paid, they'll drop out, uBPDx will melt down faster, relocate within a year. 


Is there any way I can "counter sue" the opposing side?  Is there anything I can do to discourage them from continuing this "witch hunt" against me?  Right now there are no repercussions for my uBPDx and her team to continue to attack me.  They've never been able to prove anything, it's always just wild accusations, or pieces of the truth.

This is burying my family financially, but if I don't continue, my son will be the one who suffers most. 

Any advice on what to do in this situation is greatly appreciated.  I'm open to ethical or unethical at this point... .

Thanks,
Duck

[Duck_Borders]

Hey Everyone,

I could use any input on my options.  Here are the extreme coles notes of my situation:

- Fall 2013:  Eloped with a uBPD I had just met.  Pregnant on the wedding night (not my usual style - I knew her in High School and didn't recognize the red flags quickly enough)

- Feb. 2014:  Falsely accused/arrested of DV.  uBPDx moved from Canada to Miami while pregnant.

- Fall 2016:  uBPDx shows up high to court.  I go from 0% custody to 100% custody.

- Fall 2016:  Psych evals ordered.  My eval was normal.  uBPDx diagnosed with "most severe anxiety disorder" they've ever seen.  Terms used in report: "Anti-social behaviour", "Cognitive Distortions", "Not credible", etc.


I'm doing fine with the custody aspect of this divorce.  It's been extremely frustrating as she has a mirror of herself in a lawyer who continues to throw every bs false accusation at me and they've actually fabricated evidence and recruited a Paediatrician to lie about me under oath.  I still have 100% custody.  They've also blocked the psych eval from being submitted to evidence until 2017. 

Here's my main problem: I own a small business in Canada.  I've never paid myself more than $25,000 USD.  The company has potential to be something, but when I met this woman it was still in it's start up phase and I've just never had money to pay myself more. 

uBPDx and her lawyer started off with my income manipulated to $200,000 USD.  After a year, we've got it down to $75,000 USD.  We have a financial hearing in December where I will submit more bulletproof financial statements that will prove my income is less than $40,000. 

uBPDx has worked up 6 figures in legal fees and forensic accountant fees.  They're trying to force me to pay her bills.  The way I see it, at this point, her lawyer and accountant are pot committed.  They've got so much into this case, they have nothing to lose to try to fight me and manipulate my income to at least $75,000 so that they can hopefully recoup some of their fees.  I think they're starting to see which side of the "crazy fence" they're on and they know they're never going to get paid from her. 

So far, this divorce has cost my family close to $150,000.  And we still haven't even determined an accurate income.  The case is just dragged out longer and longer.  My first lawyer also very stupidly volunteered me to pay 80% of the costs (GAL, Medical, etc.) in a misguided attempt to manipulate the GAL. 

My new (much better) lawyer says I have 2 real options.

1)  Stop paying all the money, and move here and agree to a 50/50 split.  Then hope that uBPDx screws up more (likely), over a couple years work towards majority custody and then apply to relocate back home.

2)  Continue paying all the money, prove that I have minimal income, once the opposing side isn't getting paid, they'll drop out, uBPDx will melt down faster, relocate within a year. 


Is there any way I can "counter sue" the opposing side?  Is there anything I can do to discourage them from continuing this "witch hunt" against me?  Right now there are no repercussions for my uBPDx and her team to continue to attack me.  They've never been able to prove anything, it's always just wild accusations, or pieces of the truth.

This is burying my family financially, but if I don't continue, my son will be the one who suffers most. 

Any advice on what to do in this situation is greatly appreciated.  I'm open to ethical or unethical at this point... .

Thanks,
Duck