Illusional and delusional this is so confusing though

[aydeesix]

Honestly I don't know if my wife is suffering from BPD or not. What I do know is that after 12+ years in this relationship I still love her. My wife displays many of the symptoms of BPD. The rages turn into the silent treatment which is followed up by the make up phase has become too common. She has threatened divorce at least once a year since our first year of marriage. Whenever I cave and work through steps to actually divorce her she is astonished that I would do such a thing.

I find myself stuck between a place of fight and flight. Different days I want to save my marriage and others I feel that I am just wasting time.

I am in therapy with someone who specializes with BPD and I am beginning to read Randi's book "Stop walking on eggshells". Hopefully between those resources and the online community I can rach a place where I am no longer confused.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[JoeBPD81]

hello, aydeesix

This is not an easy road, I'm glad you kept strong and you're taking new steps to make it better. Having someont to talk to and that understands and doesn't judge it a great release. You'll find here a kind ear, and a lot of experiences like yours.

Good luck!

[Tattered Heart]

Welcome aydeesix,

Sorry your relationship has been so rocky. Hopefully you can find some help here and learn new ways of communicating with your pwBPD. We have so many workshops on the right side of the page to start you out. Practicing the skills taught there could make a big difference in your relationship.