apparently this is par for the course?

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

the lawyers will drain you of money before your soon to be ex spouse gets any of what you may have left to give. I guess I am just venting    $4800 has been spent on my attorney since April 10th.    I am angry. I have not been able to concentrate on my job since I got my statement before lunch today.
I have to refund the trust with $5,839 to even proceed.

I lack the wherewithal to pay a lawyer at this rate. I am meeting with him Friday. I am writing up an offer to present to my wife and showing my lawyer on Friday, ask any pertinent questions and then hopefully she will accept it and we can move on.

I am going to lose monetarily with my offer but I will gain my life back. If I drag this out until mediation at the end of September which she could end up canceling AGAIN it would probably end up going to court which will end up costing me as much in lawyers fees when it is all said and done.

YES she will get things she does not deserve but at this point I am ready to get this thing done because I am going in the hole either way.

 

   

[byfaith]

the lawyers will drain you of money before your soon to be ex spouse gets any of what you may have left to give. I guess I am just venting    $4800 has been spent on my attorney since April 10th.    I am angry. I have not been able to concentrate on my job since I got my statement before lunch today.
I have to refund the trust with $5,839 to even proceed.

I lack the wherewithal to pay a lawyer at this rate. I am meeting with him Friday. I am writing up an offer to present to my wife and showing my lawyer on Friday, ask any pertinent questions and then hopefully she will accept it and we can move on.

I am going to lose monetarily with my offer but I will gain my life back. If I drag this out until mediation at the end of September which she could end up canceling AGAIN it would probably end up going to court which will end up costing me as much in lawyers fees when it is all said and done.

YES she will get things she does not deserve but at this point I am ready to get this thing done because I am going in the hole either way.

 

   

[takingandsending]

My kids and my sister's family were playing a role/character game called Munchkin, and one of the monsters that appeared in the game was a Lawyer. The information card noted that the Lawyer would not attack Thief characters, out of professional courtesy.

I totally understand the vent. I think I once came across a survey on this board of how much people paid on average in their divorce disputes. Really horrific numbers. Hang in there. My landlord, twice divorced, told me the other evening that the monetary impact is immediately noticeable but doesn't really produce the seismic financial devastation that we fear. I hope he's right.

[formflier]

Lawyers can get spendy... .especially when things get strung along.

I've got several legal matters going on at the moment... .luckily none of them are BPDish related.  I'm probably around $30k in legal fees and there are still some open ends and maneuvers to go.

I think (hope) that I will be able to recover them... .but legal stuff is not for the faint of heart.

Pre-nups... post-nups... all good stuff because they nail things down and limit what can be argued about.

FF