Karmic relationships are not meant to last

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

Hi All,

I have a spiritual side and was doing some research on Karmic souls. Let me know your thoughts as this does have a familiar ring to it.

For my new-age junkie friends, and also for those of you who are new to Eastern Philosophy, almost every person goes through one or more karmic relationships during their lifetime. Karmic relationships are not meant to last, and they are usually the biggest life lessons in love.

Karmic relationships are different from twin flame and soulmate relationships. In a spiritual context, karmic relationships are viewed from the lens of personal growth. Here are some of the signs of a karmic relationship.

1. They repeat patterns. If you’re on and off in your relationship, that is major sign it’s a karmic one. If you seem to be experiencing the same kinds of relationship problems, that is also a big red flag. Such relationships repeat the same patterns and remain stagnant, because the only way you can grow from them is by letting go.

2. They are selfish. Karmic relationships do not respect healthy boundaries in their partners. They serve only their own self-interest and needs. They are the perfect template for forming abusive or co-dependent relationship complexes. While one person is very invested, the other person views it more as a convenience.


 
3. They are addictive. They are characterized by highs and lows of passionate intensity. One or both partners are more in love with the idea of love, based on superficial reasons such as good looks, popularity, social or professional status.

4. They are controlling. They are obsessive and all about ownership of your partner. The other person becomes the center of your universe, and the main source of your happiness. You put them on a pedestal, and are unable to see their flaws.

5. They feel destined. You think that you cannot live without this person, and feel like you both are somehow meant to be together. You cannot fathom why it keeps failing, and you keep trying and hoping to get it right. They are extremely hard to resist, and keep drawing you in, until you learn what you need to from it.

6. There is an instant connection. Such relationships are marked by an immediate attraction. This person feels perfect to you. It feels like you have known them before, and you become instantly attached to them.

7. They create dependency. You begin to feel consumed by the relationship, and it begins to occupy your thoughts all the time. You can’t help handing them all the power. You become mentally, physically and emotionally dependent on this person.

8. They bring out your worst fears. They bring to the surface all the things you are deathly afraid of. Fear of abandonment, fear of commitment, fear of rejection, fear of loss, fear of emotional engulfment, and all the skeletons hiding in your closet.

9. They are irrational. They hold a mirror to your worst vulnerabilities and ugly insecurities. You start acting unlike yourself, and do things that you wouldn’t normally do.

10. They reveal your dark side. They show you your most undesirable and difficult characteristics that you were previously unaware of. They painfully remind you how human you actually are.

11. They are tumultuous. Such relationships are incredibly volatile, erratic and unpredictable. The best thing you can do for yourself is to identify such a relationship, and learn to let it go for your own good.

12. They push your buttons. The main purpose of these relationships is for you to learn how to properly love yourself and others, such that you stop trying to control your circumstances, become the master of your own ego, and focus on working on yourself.

13. They do not last. This person is not your forever person, how much ever you want to hope, wish and believe in your fairytale ending. Contrary to what you see on television and media, such relationships are born out of conflict and end in conflict. They are extremely unhealthy, and usually do not last.

TC mark

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[Mindfried]

Hi All,

I have a spiritual side and was doing some research on Karmic souls. Let me know your thoughts as this does have a familiar ring to it.

For my new-age junkie friends, and also for those of you who are new to Eastern Philosophy, almost every person goes through one or more karmic relationships during their lifetime. Karmic relationships are not meant to last, and they are usually the biggest life lessons in love.

Karmic relationships are different from twin flame and soulmate relationships. In a spiritual context, karmic relationships are viewed from the lens of personal growth. Here are some of the signs of a karmic relationship.

1. They repeat patterns. If you’re on and off in your relationship, that is major sign it’s a karmic one. If you seem to be experiencing the same kinds of relationship problems, that is also a big red flag. Such relationships repeat the same patterns and remain stagnant, because the only way you can grow from them is by letting go.

2. They are selfish. Karmic relationships do not respect healthy boundaries in their partners. They serve only their own self-interest and needs. They are the perfect template for forming abusive or co-dependent relationship complexes. While one person is very invested, the other person views it more as a convenience.


 
3. They are addictive. They are characterized by highs and lows of passionate intensity. One or both partners are more in love with the idea of love, based on superficial reasons such as good looks, popularity, social or professional status.

4. They are controlling. They are obsessive and all about ownership of your partner. The other person becomes the center of your universe, and the main source of your happiness. You put them on a pedestal, and are unable to see their flaws.

5. They feel destined. You think that you cannot live without this person, and feel like you both are somehow meant to be together. You cannot fathom why it keeps failing, and you keep trying and hoping to get it right. They are extremely hard to resist, and keep drawing you in, until you learn what you need to from it.

6. There is an instant connection. Such relationships are marked by an immediate attraction. This person feels perfect to you. It feels like you have known them before, and you become instantly attached to them.

7. They create dependency. You begin to feel consumed by the relationship, and it begins to occupy your thoughts all the time. You can’t help handing them all the power. You become mentally, physically and emotionally dependent on this person.

8. They bring out your worst fears. They bring to the surface all the things you are deathly afraid of. Fear of abandonment, fear of commitment, fear of rejection, fear of loss, fear of emotional engulfment, and all the skeletons hiding in your closet.

9. They are irrational. They hold a mirror to your worst vulnerabilities and ugly insecurities. You start acting unlike yourself, and do things that you wouldn’t normally do.

10. They reveal your dark side. They show you your most undesirable and difficult characteristics that you were previously unaware of. They painfully remind you how human you actually are.

11. They are tumultuous. Such relationships are incredibly volatile, erratic and unpredictable. The best thing you can do for yourself is to identify such a relationship, and learn to let it go for your own good.

12. They push your buttons. The main purpose of these relationships is for you to learn how to properly love yourself and others, such that you stop trying to control your circumstances, become the master of your own ego, and focus on working on yourself.

13. They do not last. This person is not your forever person, how much ever you want to hope, wish and believe in your fairytale ending. Contrary to what you see on television and media, such relationships are born out of conflict and end in conflict. They are extremely unhealthy, and usually do not last.

TC mark

MORE FROM THOUGHT CATALOG

[Harley Quinn]

Hi Mf,

That's certainly an interesting read.  Here's the link to the original article, for anyone who wants to know the source: https://thoughtcatalog.com/nikita-mor/2017/02/13-signs-youre-in-what-is-known-as-a-karmic-relationship/

What do you think stood out most to you in relation to your own situation?

Love and light x

[Mindfried]

To be honest with you all of them.

Just looking at things from a different perspective meaning the spiritual side instead of the physiological side.

[Harley Quinn]

It's good to not get stuck in a rut of only looking at things from one perspective as there are always different ways to view things that we experience in life.  Does looking at things a different way alter how you feel about your ex/the relationship with regards to their place/purpose in your life?  What do you feel you've gained the most through taking this alternative approach to viewing the situation you've experienced?  Does it help you with your healing?

Love and light x

[Mindfried]

Thank you. I believe everything happens for a reason and there are lessons to be learned from everything in life. What I have learned from this type of relationship is it is extremely painful and very difficult to move on from. No matter how much we learn, read or how many people (Therapist) we talk to the only constant I find is time. I am hoping the more time that passes and the more time distance I put between myself and the relationship the better I will get and my heart mind and soul will fully heal so I can move forward and find the true love of my life since I feel I have a lot to offer.

[Red5]

I have a spiritual side and was doing some research on Karmic souls. Let me know your thoughts as this does have a familiar ring to it.

Hello Minfried !

I have to say that I really like the way you write !

This rings true with me, this ‘karmic relationship’ thing.

I have been reading your posts, and looks to me that we have chewed a lot of the same dirt in life... .“to borrow a line from the old Clint Eastwood movie “Heartbreak Ridge”... .

I was also in a long time marriage... .twenty-one years, had three kids, all grown now, then we divorced, long story... .then I started dating... .and I married the second woman I dated, after about four years of dating... .we have been married for almost eight years... .come New Year’s Day which is our anniversary.

Yes, as I read about your post marital relationship... .it was like I was reading something I’d written... .

Except I married her... .

She moved out on December the 1st, .another long story.

I share many of your feelings / writings in regards to maybe living single from here out, .and now I read about “karmic relationships”... .wow,

As you wrote... .these relationships (BPD/npd) follow the same constructs... .the same “playbook” as it were,

I am fifty-two now, and pretty beat up... .this woman I’ve been married to since 2011 has really given me the “what for”... .

Like you I had no clue what was happening, until I came across the boarderline phenomenon... .

Anyways, there it is, we are all doing the lowcrawl through the same dirt... .the same swamp... . 

I concur with another thing you wrote... .since she has gone... .no more stress, no more rages, no more eggshells... .mine were more like anti-personnel mines more than eggshells... .

Keep posting Minfried !

Kind regards... .“steady as she goes” !

Red5