Learning, what's taught in DBT - Inside Out Animation, what do you think?

[wendydarling]

Last week my 30DD went to DBT. She's just shared with me she had been feeling out of sorts, not looking forward to it, she made it!   As she is not working, though working to get well I pay for her weekly cabs to and from, that's my contribution, attending is her responsbility. And it's been my contribution since 2015 to support her getting to medical appointments, she does not drive and public transport can be overwhelming at times especially at rush hours. She travels on public transport to get around. Knowing she can call a cab to get to DBT, med appointments, ride the cusp of her emotions telling her don't go, she CAN and she feels safe and can continue with taking on her responsibility.

At DBT they showed Inside Out to her delight. This is new to me! We've agreed to watch together over Christmas. DD went to the movies when it came out circa 2015 with a friend and talked after with her friend for 2 hours, this is it!

We've spent an hour talking, well me listening, validating as we do, off the cuff of this animation, her sharing about school, college, university, work and her struggles. DD wishes she knew then what she does now, DD continues to figure it out for her.
https://themighty.com/2017/09/inside-out-sadness-bing-bong-depression/

Our conversation ended with... .DD sharing I wish they'd bring out a sequel for teenagers and a sequel or adults .

DD wishes in the school environment she'd had the benefit of mindfulness classes, now very gradually being introduced UK and often through parents, akin to listening to a child read which I did for 3 years.

Have you seen the animation? Was it helpful, do you relate? I'll watch later next week ahead of watching with DD.
WDx  

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Feeling Better]

Hi WD

Thanks for posting the link, I have to say, it has made me think. We can often fall into the trap of wanting/trying to fix things, we don’t like to see someone we care about being sad and so it is easy for us to try and help them come out of their sadness rather than just sitting with them and acknowledging their sadness for what it is. We have the idea that agreeing with their sadness and talking about it will increase their sadness but in actual fact the clip shows that the opposite happens. I could see that trying to cheer up the one feeling sad is invalidating and not allowing those feelings to be felt, whereas acknowledging the sad feelings and allowing someone to have them is very validating.

Thanks again WD, and yes, I did find it helpful x 

[heartandwhole]

Such a great lesson/reminder, wendydarling, thanks for sharing that clip. I think it's human nature to want to take away pain from people we care about, but having been on the receiving end of that many times, it can feel very awkward—especially as I work on embracing uncomfortable feelings when they come up. I think it may be one reason why I tend to isolate when I'm feeling down: I don't want others to try to shut down what I'm feeling.

If I were your daughter, I'd feel cared for and supported as I called for the cab to take me to DBT. 

heartandwhole

[wendydarling]

Thanks Feeling Better and heartandwhole

We finally watched it over the holiday, I did 2 repeats and recommend highly  

There are five emotion characters, Joy, Sadness, Disgust, Fear, Anger and seeing how they relate to each other, trigger each other and learn from each other was so well scripted. Joy did exactly as you say closed down Sadness from feeling the emotion till she listened and allowed her to sit with her emotion.

WDx