I get a break to be a caretaker...

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

Well, I don't think any of the things she points to are catastrophic (where we live, the state of the house, etc.) I don't buy into that. That she screams, cries, hits herself, and wants to die most every night does seem pretty catastrophic. The catastrophe is her emotions and the inability to manage them, but that's where we are, and an arson fire still needs to be put out. I feel like deciding now that she needs to learn to manage her emotions on her own is like telling someone who can't even read Dr. Seuss to go read James Joyce.

I think I'm okay with letting her be unhappy. I'm not okay with the current level of unhappiness.

[stolencrumbs]

Well, I don't think any of the things she points to are catastrophic (where we live, the state of the house, etc.) I don't buy into that. That she screams, cries, hits herself, and wants to die most every night does seem pretty catastrophic. The catastrophe is her emotions and the inability to manage them, but that's where we are, and an arson fire still needs to be put out. I feel like deciding now that she needs to learn to manage her emotions on her own is like telling someone who can't even read Dr. Seuss to go read James Joyce.

I think I'm okay with letting her be unhappy. I'm not okay with the current level of unhappiness.

[formflier]

I feel like deciding now that she needs to learn to manage her emotions on her own is like telling someone who can't even read Dr. Seuss to go read James Joyce.
 

Why tell them?  Is it your job to "connect the dots" for other adults?

Put it another way... .how has the "dot connecting" and suggestions and other activities designed to "help" turned out for you?

If someone can't read... .they can ask for help learning?  Right?

And... what if someone makes a choice not to learn, or chooses to blame the inability to read on various things, vice take responsibility?

Tough stuff to think through.

FF

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