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Things I couldn't have known
Emotional Blackmail: Fear, Obligation and Guilt (FOG)
Am I the Cause of Borderline Personality Disorder?
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I think it's Borderline Personality Disorder, but how can I know?
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Author Topic: How can help?  (Read 530 times)
Anjali
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 2


« on: June 23, 2019, 06:42:09 PM »

I need some advice dealing with a grown child.
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Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
FaithHopeLove
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Shaky
Posts: 1606



« Reply #1 on: June 23, 2019, 07:49:21 PM »

Hello Anjali and welcome to the group. You have come to the right place for help and support. Can you tell us more about your adult child? What about their behavior concerns you?
 
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Only Human
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: divorced since the 90's
Posts: 1027


Love is still the answer


« Reply #2 on: June 24, 2019, 10:19:37 PM »

Hi Anjali!

I join Faith in welcoming you here and echo what she says, you've come to the right place for information and advice  

What's going on? What can we help you with?

~ OH
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"It's our god forsaken right to be loved, loved, loved, loved."
-Jason Mraz, I'm Yours
Anjali
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 2


« Reply #3 on: June 27, 2019, 02:22:57 PM »

My 35  year old son has been fighting a serious depression for over a year. At one point his therapist said that she thought he might be BPD and perhaps DBT would better suit him. So far therapy, various drug regimes, and DBT so far have not helped ease his pain at all.
The question: he calls me when he lonely, scared, sad or upset. (we live in the same city but not near by). He doesn't want me to hang up. I don't know how long should I let him say the same things over and over? How long should I stay on the phone with him?
His girlfriend broke up with him and he is obsessing constantly, asking the same questions: "how do I get her back" "can I write to her" "why won't she come back". All I say is I dont know. What should I be doing?
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FaithHopeLove
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Shaky
Posts: 1606



« Reply #4 on: June 27, 2019, 04:03:16 PM »

Those are all really good questions. On the one hand you want to help your son but on the other hand my goodness. How many hours can you spend on the phone with him saying the same thing over and over? Maybe it is time for some limit setting. What would you feel comfortable with? Maybe limit him to a certain number of calls per day? A time limit on each one? Maybe some others here have more ideas about how you can make this situation bearable. In the meantime please take good care of yourself. You are dealing with a lot.
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