From the first date I've wondered how to handle her emotions

[trampledfoot]

Hi new to the board but I am going through some issues with my BPD gf/ex-gf(at the moment)

anyways i remember one of our first dates we had go into some sort of political discussion and she went into some instant break down with tears because i challenged her POV.  Then yet another early date we were discussing college and had mentioned it was rather easy for me... .  again tears.

Then finally about 4 months into dating i was taken aback because she never mentioned her goals, dreams or ambitions in life and boom rage and tears. She has extreme confidence and self esteem issues. 

In any event 2.5 years of my life later and countless break ups and I am still stuck on her currently wondering why i got a txt message yesterday saying "I dont think I love you any more" when just the other day she was wanting to talk marriage and kids.

[mitchell16]

Im sorry you are experience this. I do understand the confusion with the mixed message. I have found that constantley in my 2 year relationship with BPDGF. One day telling me doesnt wnat to get married only do bring up us getting married or sh ewill starting talking about weddings. But just as soon as I bite you can beleive she will back up or usual break up the relationship. we are currentley broke up and not talking. I am going to do my best to never go back. I feel like I have tried everything i can do. An hour before her last melt down we was having a good time at a bar, I went to the bathroom she texted me " i love you" with in an hour later she was cussing me out, telling me she was done with the relationship. its never predictable. maybe someone else on this board can give you better advice because I have failed with everything I have tried. Good luck.

[trampledfoot]

Hi Mithchell:

My girlfriend will argue with me and tell me i need to commit to her and tell me i cant go any where without her.  She sent me an email of pictures of a girl leading a guy all over the world.  The next day she breaks up with me and tells me I havent been in love with you for months, I was just doing trying to fall in love with you.

She refuses help for her or us and states that relationships dont need to be "worked" on and they should come naturally. 

So so very frustrating I want this to be the last time we break-up but I do love her and she is an amzing person outside of this disorder.  I just keep hoping it goes away or shell get help and I'd be willing to stick it out with her if she  was getting help.  Its jsut impossible for me to commit to a girl who wont get help and i constantly feel like i am only seconds away from being dumper or the dreaded "ignore." She will ignore me right in front of me just refuse to respond to what i am saying or trying to resolve its horrible. 

Anyways i have been rambling