Does DBT help?

[ADecadeLost]

Hi guys,

I was just hoping to maybe get some reassurance from some of you on the board as to the improvements that your BPD significant others have shown as a result of Dialectic Therapy.  My BPD wife began treatment a few months ago and her doctor had her leave her medication as part of the treatment.

A few months in and it's been a constant struggle.  Instead of depression or dysregulation striking every one to two months, it's now striking every week or so.  The catalysts of these outbursts have become more outrageous each time (ie. I didn't eat the entire plate she made me for lunch because I was full today) and the abuse I take more severe.  It's becoming more and more difficult and I just want to know that at least for some of you, dialectic improved things.

She does not want to go back on pills, but I can say outright that there is a limit to how long I will be able to handle this frequency and intensity of outbursts.  Any thought or stories that you can share would be great.

Thanks

[ADecadeLost]

Anyone?

[LetItBe]

Sorry to hear you're struggling right now. 

I recall hearing that sometimes things get worse before they get better.  I guess introducing new, healthy behaviors and removing old, unhealthy ones might be akin to yanking the carpet out from underneath someone's feet.  Would it be possible to discuss your concerns with her doctor?

DBT can help pwBPD (and even other disorders).  If you read some of the "Success Stories" at the stop of the "Staying Board," you will read several accounts of people whose partners improved with DBT.  I know a couple of therapists who do DBT with pwBPD and have seen their clients heal and lead happy lives.  It takes hard work, but it is possible. 

I'm glad your wife is getting help and working on herself.  I hope that things improve for both of you soon!

[crazylife]

DBT does work well, but it takes a good year of practice to make things click, and another 6-12 to integrate it into a person's thought process to function automatically(most of the time)

I am not a professional... but am familiar with a program at a childrens psych hospital. You need to learn to use it and the terminiology as well, so you can support your pwBPD.

Good luck...

[waverider]

A few things that effect the effectiveness of any therapy

Clients commitment to it. This is one of the reason many DBT centers need to asses if someone is actually ready for it or not before taking them on, also a reason for at least reducing meds first.

Home environment and support, especially whether you are in a place to provide the support needed, you are an important part in this.

Therapy will first require them to acknowledge and face 'demons" that up to now have been buried, and to accept their part in issues they have previously denied. This happens before they can learn how to deal with them. This can result in things getting worse in the meantime. It is also why the end result can be worse if they drop out half way

You are attempting change a persons entire personality, that takes a long time even with normal folks. Especially going from learning what you are supposed to do through to it being the instinctive norm.