How does your BPD partner deal with your ex?

[Moonie75]

I've read so much on these boards about BPD partners accusing of us still having feelings about ex's. I know mine was obsessed with the notion I was still in love with my ex!

I was no longer in contact with any of my ex's & it still caused me huge arguments & sometimes even put me on the end of rages.

For those who are in a relationship with BPD s/o and co-parenting with an ex from a previous relationship, how does the BPD cope with you having contact with your child's other parent?

[emotionaholic]

At first I was accused of all sorts of stuff.  Then it simply became rages that my sons mom controlled me.  And finally after 3 years was not an issue.  Though she still accused me of wanting to have sex with all my friends wives.  My sons mom had her house broken into about 6 months ago and called int the middle of the night in a panic and wanted to come to my house because she was scared.  I was ready for hell fire and brimstone when I told my gf that she had spent the night on the couch, but to my surprise she said that was very kind of me.  Go figure.

[frustrated b/f]

My uBPD g/f refused to even acknowledge that my ex-wife and I were divorced an always refer to my ex as my "wife" until I seriously checked the hit out of her. I explained that while you're still married (she was married/separated for four of our five year relationship), I went through and paid a LOT for my divorce and the right to refer to her as my EX-WIFE. Still to this day, she will never mention her, even though my ex-wife is essentially dying of stage 4 cancer and my sons and I are coping with it. Never asked if my boys were alright, how's she doing, nothing! I even explained my frustration and her response, was basically, "why should she care?" I explained that if my ex were to pass away, she would be the closest mother-figure to my boys. She seemed to understand, however has not mentioned anything else about it.

[Undone123]

Mine didn't want to know anything. I'm the sort of person who will openly tell if asked, but leave it up to them if they want to know... . So she never asked, so I never told. I don't have keep things from exes, so she never new anything... .

Her on the other hand, loved talking about her exes. It was at one point a favorite topic

[wishfulthinking]

Mine has never said anything much about my ex until yesterday. I got up and wanted to take a shower.  My ex was picking my daughter up at 1.  My uBPDh told me I didn't need a shower yet, I had just gotten up (WTH? I always shower and dress when I get up, I can't stand being in my pajamas all day).  He said why do you want to shower so badly?  So you can look good when he comes to pick up D9?  I was like... . what?  I just said nevermind and went into the kitchen.  He rode my a$$ all morning and completely freaked out on me by last night.  I had to sleep in my daughter's bed, she stayed all night across the street at me best friend's house.  He was hateful this morning... . oh well.