So, I filed mid April... . beginning of last week, DH and his attorney responded to first request for discovery with a request for a 90 day extension and a 90 day stay because there are no Irreconciable Differences and the marriage is repairable--NOT!
They also allege that a prenup I signed, and my husband tore up within the first year year of marriage, is in effect. So, after my mini-meltdown midweek my attorney contacts me and tells me that he was contacted by my husbands attorney and that they would like to go to mediation as soon as possible. My attorney says the mediator is excellent and he feels this is a good sign and he was encouraging me to say yes, sooner rather than later. I asked, "Are we mediating the Property Settlement or Getting back together (dripping with sarcasm and disgust)?". He said, "Oh no, just the Property Settlement, they start talking the marriage and we just get up and leave".
Thoughts on their strategy here?
Our first settlement conference and the hearing for the stay are June 11 th.
Does it look better to go to mediation voluntarily as opposed to having the courts send you?
My attorney and I asked for a 4 way sit down meeting initially and where turned down, si I don't quite get this.
Don't know what to tell you... . my BPDx "mediated" with me after filing and then had her attorney try to renegotiate all the stuff we "mediated" agreements on. And then she wanted to "mediate" ultra-important issues like whether our daughter should be able to see a midnight show of "The Hobbit"... . on a school night. I'm going to drop $200 an hour to "negotiate" that?
No. Freaking. Way.
We also "mediated" an agreement that would enable me to inspect her home for cleanliness once a month (background: she had been living in utter filth and social services was involved). She blew that one off too, even when I enlisted the cops to enforce the order.
Keep in mind many BPDs are manipulative and charming, and feel much more comfortable bull___ting a mediator... . than a judge. They face no consequences for BSing the mediator.
The real question is whether this person will abide by what was "mediated." Best of luck with that.
I think you want as much as possible in writing, decided by a judge.
