Stress and Physical Illness

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

I separated from my BPD wife in June.  I have had very little contact with her since leaving.  Since August the majority of contact has been emails.  Last night we unfortunately had a phone conversation.  Immediately after the phone conversation I began having dry heaves. I certainly believe this was due to stress.

When I was with my wife I suffered many illnesses I now attribute to stress. After leaving my stress level has lessened and my health is certainly improving.

Wondering if others felt they had stress related illnesses dealing with BPDs and if they noticed recurrence of the stress related issues even after rather short encounters with their significant BPD once they had left the BPD.

[Paddington1]

I separated from my BPD wife in June.  I have had very little contact with her since leaving.  Since August the majority of contact has been emails.  Last night we unfortunately had a phone conversation.  Immediately after the phone conversation I began having dry heaves. I certainly believe this was due to stress.

When I was with my wife I suffered many illnesses I now attribute to stress. After leaving my stress level has lessened and my health is certainly improving.

Wondering if others felt they had stress related illnesses dealing with BPDs and if they noticed recurrence of the stress related issues even after rather short encounters with their significant BPD once they had left the BPD.

[Turkish]

Somatic responses to mental stress are unfortunately normal. I exhibited mm any PTSD symptoms for many months after my uBPDx moved out. Sometimes, they were triggered by reading this site (no offense to anyone). Sometimes, they were like panic attacks, something I hadn't experienced. I lost 26 lbs in a little over two months while I was detaching, but my Ex was still living with me. Do you have access to a counselor? I found that a gentle, objective voice of reason helped me. Mental trauma is nothing to be dismissed. Its effects are real.

[enlighten me]

Hi paddington

Im sure I ended up with PTSD from the relationship. One member on here started going blind due to high cortisol levels caused by stress. It is very common for stress related illnesses.

As Turkish has said a counseler may help especially one that deals with PTSD. Other things you can do are reduce caffeine intake, hot baths, mild exercise, lisrening to music, dancr and eat healthily. These all reduce cortisol the stress hormone.

What you have to realise is that you have been abused so your body is hypersensative and is wound tight ready to react.

[DangIthurts]

I mean I had times I'd sleep a lot to try and make it to a better time, blew off friends and events so that it couldn't be used to justify her doing something, and sometimes blew off friends/events because I knew I'd speak up about all of it.

Then towards the last few months I started having heart attack like symptoms that I'd originally attributed to taking 600+mg of caffeine a day... .Only problem was I'd been cold turkey on that for well over a month. I had developed panic attacks from it all. buddy gave me a Xanax and it immediately helped.

[Blimblam]

I started to have ptsd symptoms and pretty sever panic attacks constantly and was having an anxiety attack at a low to extreme level for months on end. Periods of inability to sleep severe chronic chest pain and stomach knots. Feeling like I lost my mind.  :)epersonalization. Absolute hell. I also lost about 30 pounds.

[going places]

I separated from my BPD wife in June.  I have had very little contact with her since leaving.  Since August the majority of contact has been emails.  Last night we unfortunately had a phone conversation.  Immediately after the phone conversation I began having dry heaves. I certainly believe this was due to stress.

When I was with my wife I suffered many illnesses I now attribute to stress. After leaving my stress level has lessened and my health is certainly improving.

Wondering if others felt they had stress related illnesses dealing with BPDs and if they noticed recurrence of the stress related issues even after rather short encounters with their significant BPD once they had left the BPD.

Divorced 6-14

Told him to leave 7-14

Blocked him on all comm. except email 8-14

Before all of this, the stress / abuse withered me down to 114lbs.

Insomnia or 'sleep' filled with nightmares.

Hypervigilance like it was my job.

Perpetual state of 'fight or flight' / always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

My adrenal glands were shot.

The amount of cortisol in my system was obscene.

My hair was literally falling out.

I could go on and on.

I have not 'seen' his face since the end of July and I make sure that I do everything in my power that we NOT cross paths. I have not heard his voice since August.

I AM healing.

Communicating with him via email only has helped me to see his abuse game, and has helped me to realize that it's NOT me, it's him... .and when to shut it down. But it upsets me none the less... .

Praise the Lord, it's less and less each time... .

I 'will' have to see him one last time (when the house sells) but then after that?

Never again.

I'm packin' it in and heading south with the migrating birds!

[sherlock3]

I never realized the stress I was facing but a little over a year in (53 years old in great physical shape) I had a heart attack. I do now believe that it was the stress she brought into my life. By the way 2 weeks before my heart attack she overdosed on her psych meds while I was with her. 1 week after my heart attack she did it again... .at my house. She showed her concern for me by making me call 911 for the second time in 3 weeks so she didnt OD. I realized what stress can do to you. She was the most selfish person I have ever met in my life.