Hi Lifewriter,
Sorry to hear that things are difficult for you.
I don't suffer from BPD, but to help my recovery from a long relationship with udpwBPDex and after doing quite a bit of research and reading I decided to work with a schema therapist.
From what I've read in the in practitioners guide
www.amazon.com/Schema-Therapy-A-Practitioners-Guide/dp/1593853726, the schema bible for therapists, it can sometimes take up to three years of therapy to get results and Young also says that some patients may even need to remain in therapy for the rest of their lives
My schema T is highly qualified and very experienced and she is very positive about the effectiveness of Schema therapy. I specifically asked her how effective Schema T was at treating BPD. On her suggestion I recorded my sessions and I've found it very useful for future reference
She said,
"There are some great therapies out there for personality disorders. Schema therapy I think is one of the best, DBT works very well at a symptom level, but it's really helpful for a lot of people and there are some others which have got some really good research results. But in any group study there are some that really do well and there's still those that don't even though they're given the same therapy.
So there's still other factors at play other than the therapy itself and in my experience it can be all sorts of things. The circumstances the person is in can keep reinforcing the disorder patterns or it could be something about the rigidity of their mind or it could be how wiling they are to access their emotions. There's all sorts of factors that determine whether one person can make progress."I would have liked to explored this more with her, but we were focussing on my treatment and not my ex.
From what I've read in the practitioners guide in some of the research that you can find online there are a number of factors that can contribute to making personality disorders more resistant to treatment. Age (getting treated earlier appears to be more effective), comorbidity with other mental health issues (bipolar, ADHD) and childhood sexual abuse often indicate a more negative prognosis.
Sorry if this doesn't help you much, but I really hope things get better and work out for the best
Reforming