"I've told you to get those done and I told you to clean the living room... .so what is the problem... .?" (those means taxes... .I think) :)irect quote
She will also say "we agreed on this... ." when what really happened is she "told me" and in many cases I said no.
If she told you to do it and you said no, then it becomes a matter of enforcing your boundary. You said no and now she is hoping that she can badger you or tell you what to do until you comply.
Hmmm... .extinction burst... .from what boundary or action on my part. I'd have to think on this
You said that this is the first year that she has been as involved in the taxes. That is a change in behavior on your part. You are involving her more and she isn't handling it that well.
Good questions... .the best option is for her to learn how to do the taxes and actually do them... .and have the confidence, knowledge and understanding that comes with that... .and not depend on me for that.
How realistic is that? If you want to go that route, then perhaps you should think about what it would take for the two of you two file taxes separately.
I should have said "expressing" happiness or "madness". Maybe I should say "negativity".
You can't control what emotions she expresses. Even wanting her to express emotions differently is not going to work. All you can do is find ways to protect yourself when she start expressing emotions in a way that harms you.
Here is the thing... .she has made claims for years and years about how she can do this and that (financially)
She made the big power play with money and took control. She has asked (some direct and some inferred) to be rescued several times from the responsibility she has taken on.
I haven't... .and I'm not going to do it. She either will figure it out on her own... .or she won't.
What are you gaining from drawing this line in the sand? Is drawing this line in the sand helping your relationship or hurting it? Is there an alternative where there is a system of checks and balances so that neither one of you have all of the control?
